Page 47 of Play Dirty

“Huh. Well, I guess I’ll have to look into it.”

“Why’s she want to know this stuff?” I ask.

“Well,” Ixion says, then stops, like he’s choosing his words carefully. “She was slightly obsessed with the family, ya know? The whole fantasy that place kinda encapsulates. I mean the house is goddamned gorgeous. And the gardens, in the backyard and next door. It’s just very… perfect. She’s fixated on the reason why that family left everything behind. Like, at first she thought it was like a summer home. Like maybe they lived somewhere else in the winters. But then she found out you actually owned the house, which blew that theory out of the water. So every day she’s got some crazy made-up story about who these people are and where they went.”

“Wow,” I say, unsure what to think about all that. “She’s definitely got one of those obsessive personalities, doesn’t she?”

Ixion smiles, like this is just one of those quirks he loves about her. “Just a little bit. But I have another question for you. Since we’re here.”

“Shoot,” I say, kinda loving this interaction with Ixion. It feels like maybe we turned a corner. That the past is the past and now we’re… I dunno. We’ve forged a new, different kind of relationship.

“What the fuck are you doing with Augustine?”

“Shit, man.” I sigh, shaking my head. “I don’t know. She’s all up in my face. Wants me to help her and Alexander…” I shrug. Because I don’t really know how to explain this.

“Wants you to help them do what?”

“Like… fix their marriage? I swear, Ixion, I’m not playing here, but I feel very much like I’m playing a game. They have turned into a couple of very fucked-up people.”

“And a part of you wonders if you’re to blame?” Ix asks.

And the funny thing is… I don’t think he meant that to be mean. I seriously think he just said it because he really thinks that’s what’s on my mind. “No.” I huff. “Look, OK. So I lied a little back in LA. So I set you and her up just to piss off Alexander and break them apart. I get it. I was a dick. I’ve apologized. I walked away, left them alone, started over, tried to make good, changed my ways, blah, blah, blah. And they got married, and moved on, and separated, and got back together. Whatever. It’s their life. Whatever this is they’re into now has nothing to do with me.”

“Wow,” Ixion says, leaning back in his chair. “You’re a little bit defensive, dude.”

I lean in, my elbows on the table, and look him straight in the eyes. “They are a couple of fucked-up people, OK? And yeah, OK, so are we. Fine. We’re all a little fucked up. But the shit they want me to do with them, Ixion. It’s fuckin’ weird.”

“Weird how?” he asks, leaning forward again.

I’m not sure I should even try to explain it. At least to him. I should call Lucinda and get her opinion. She’s the therapist who set up Evangeline’s “treatment” and the whole reason why Ixion and Evangeline are together.

“Just tell me,” he says. “I’ve already seen the weird and the ugly with you guys.”

“Don’t classify me with them. I mean, OK, I’ve got my weird and ugly side too. But don’t classify me with them.”

“Shit, must be serious.”

I sigh, then ease forward again so now we’re both leaning forward on the table. “Have you ever heard of… people… or like… a fetish where people…”

“Just fucking spit it out,” Ix says.

“Where people get off on fighting each other?”

His head does that taken-aback thing and he frowns. “Fight? Like… argue?”

“No,” I say. “Not like argue. Like slapping and shit?” And then he’s about to say something and I already know what he’s going to say, so I put up a hand to stop him. “No, not like a dominant-submissive thing, either. Because that’s not the dynamic. There’s no top or bottom. It’s like equal top and bottom at all times.”

“Like… they get off on hitting each other?” He’s squinting his eyes.

I nod. “Yeah. She wants him to slap her, but he wants her to hit him back. And he refuses to engage anymore because… I dunno, he lost control once and so never again. So he stopped fucking her, I guess. Only gets her off other ways. And now they want me to join them so I can control Alexander while they play this fucking fight game with each other.”

“Wow,” Ix says, leaning back in his chair.

“Right?”

He makes this little whistle noise. “Yeah, that’s weird.”

“I think so too. But I’m gonna ask Lucinda about it. Because, get this. Fucking Augustine owns the old Turning Point Club building and I want to buy it and reopen the club, but she won’t sell it to me unless I give this whole sexual moderator thing a try for three weeks.”