Page 192 of Buy Back My Love

The first few times, Van didn’t say anything. After about the twentieth, he leaned closer to the bed.

“He good, Lee.”

“I know.”

Five minutes later, I checked again. Van caught me doing it. “He still good.”

“I said I know.”

Mama looked up from her phone. “Leave her alone, Van.”

“I’m trying to keep her from worrying herself to death.”

Mama gave him a look. “You ever met somebody who stopped worrying because somebody told ’em to stop worrying?”

“Thank you, Mama,” I said.

Van looked from her to me and shook his head. “I see where you get it from.”

I narrowed my eyes. “Get what?”

He picked his phone back up. “Nothing.”

Mama nodded approvingly. “Smart man.”

The contractions eventually went from something I could breathe through to something that had me gripping the bedrail and questioning every woman who had voluntarily done this more than once. By the time I asked for the epidural, every brave thought I’d ever had was gone.

Another contraction finally eased, and I looked at my nurse. “Where the anesthesiologist at?”

“They’re coming.”

“They need to come faster.”

Van tried rubbing my lower back.

“Don’t touch me.”

His hand disappeared immediately. “Aight.”

About thirty seconds later, another contraction started.

“Rub my back.”

Van looked at me, then over at Mama like he needed a witness.

Mama shrugged. “Welcome to childbirth.”

He started rubbing again.

Once the epidural finally kicked in and I could think like a human being again, I apologized. Sort of.

“You know I ain’t mean it.”

Sitting beside my bed, Van gave me a look. “You absolutely meant it.”

“At the time.”

“Exactly.”