Page 19 of Of Shadows and Blood

“It’s strange, your comfort,” I observe. His jaw ticks. “You just look so comfortable here.” I gesture to him when he comes back to the couch. “You definitely fit the part.”

Sawyer smiles and his eyes trace down my face, landing on my lips. Our intimacy is such a shared comfort that I nearly lean in but he stands before I can.

“When will I see you again?” I ask. A lot of scenarios are playing out in my mind but so many things are clear. Sawyer is not a prince, I have not been asleep upstairs for two years and we will leave. But the questions still linger. Sawyer is hiding something. He always has that look about him, I realize, and figures aren’t my strong suit, but something is not adding up.

Sawyer peeks out the bay window curtain briefly before heading to the oak door. “Hopefully soon, but do not seek me out, Liv, even if you want to. I will come when it is safe for us. Do you understand?” I walk to the door and close the distance with a hug.

“Yes, Sawyer.” This foreign place is full of unknown dangers. I have to trust his experience. If he is truly acting a part as I am then we must work together. His eyes linger on mine a half-second too long before pulling me into one more brief hug.

He doesn’t shut the door and his silhouette treks slowly up the hill illuminated by the moonlight. Just over his head is the looming castle.

Lux.

Chapter 6

The Village

Some decisions are made in haste when life is running against you, like a backwind. You will do anything to free yourself of circumstances, even if they might damn you in the end. But the darkness could never be truly damning.

“You should have figured it out,” a whisper surfaces near my ear.

I roll over and my head brushes a hand reaching for my cheek. Lazily, I open my eyes and find Sawyer sitting on the edge of my bed, eyes worn with what, I do not know.

“What – why are you here? You came back,” I say, propping myself on my shoulders. He’s here. In my room. In my house. I pray Ma doesn’t wake with her room right below mine.

“Be quiet,” he chuckles. “I know this is crossing some boundary, but I had to see you,” Sawyer breathes. He must have just gotten back from his trip because a faint sheen of sweat catches the moonlight. I sit up fully and run my hands through my hair, pulling it to the side. A breeze reaches into the room alerting my senses to the sweat drenched nightgown pressed to my chest.

“Ma’s asleep downstairs,” I whisper, craning my neck to make sure no candles are on below. Ma sleeps on the sofa in the living room.

Sawyer scoots closer and the moonlight illuminates the side of his face. His eyes search mine for something and I feel odd under his gaze.

“You’re beautiful,” he murmurs, tucking a lock of hair behind my ear. I blush and look away.

“I’ve lost most of my beauty,” I manage to say, noticing how loose my gown is on my body, “but thank you.”

“That’s not true. You’ve been…” He pauses to take me in again. “You’ve been magnificent your whole life.”

“You haven’t known me long enough.” I arch my eyebrow.

“It feels like a lifetime,” Sawyer responds. “When I first saw you –” he clears his throat – “on my porch, I mean, you caught my eye.”

“What did you come here to say?” I try to steer our conversation.

Sawyer ignores my question again and re-tucks my hair and traces his fingers lightly across my jaw, as if examining me.

“Sawyer, just say it,” I urge. Whatever he has to say, he can’t find the words to do it. “You’ve wakened me for some reason.”

“You must hear me out. Completely, Liv. I don’t have much time.” His brow furrows and he glances over his shoulder again. I, too, look at the hole in the floor, worried Ma might hear.

He takes my hands, pressing his lips into a thin line and breathing a heavy sigh. “There is so much I want to say, have always wanted to say to you.” I squeeze his fingers in return, urging him to continue.

“You should have figured out how much I care for you. Hasn’t it been obvious? No, don’t answer that. I don’t think you have noticed. It drives me insane when I think of how there is nothing, truly nothing I would not do for you. No ask too much, no request too difficult, as long as it ensures your happiness,” he admits, locking eyes with mine.

“Where did this come from?”

“It has always been here.” He places his hand on his chest and scoots close on the bed. Sawyer is being honest for once. I am unsure how to respond, how to feel. His words echo in my mind.

“I just feel for you, Liv, in so many ways,” Sawyer breathes, meeting my eyes for some level of acceptance. I look away, leaving my hands with his.