Page 123 of Kickoff

"Is she...will she be okay?" My voice sounded foreign to my own ears.

"Yes. Eventually. With medical treatment and therapy and support. And time. She did it once, so there’s no reason why she can’t do it again. If she wants to get better. It has to come from her, though."

"Will she continue to swim?" If someone could understand what her sport meant to her, it was me.

"Since there are no other swim meets before Winter Break, we'll reassess how it goes once school resumes in January. For now, it's too soon to tell. Coach Vivien promised it wouldn't affect her college offers. She'll deal with them herself in the meantime to remove as much pressure from Melinda as possible."

I nodded. "Good. Do you think I can come to see her tonight?"

"No idea. We have a doctor’s appointment in an hour. Come knocking after dinner and we'll see how she's doing."

I looked over my shoulder to watch Melinda as she hauled herself onto the backseat of her parents’ car. Mrs. Shepard squeezed a dejected Paige’s hand. "She's not really mad at you, honey. She'll understand it once the truth doesn't hurt so much anymore."

I draped an arm around Paige’s heaving shoulders and pulled her to me, wishing Melinda was the girl I was comforting right now. "Shhh. It's okay."

"I know I did the right thing when I shared what was going on. It's just... I hate the idea Mel hates me." Her sobs shook her body.

"She doesn't hate you,” Mrs. Shepard said. “Her ego is hurt and doing all the talking at the moment. Even though it’s hard, don’t take any of her accusations personally." Mrs. Shepards patted my shoulder. “I know you love my daughter, Mason. Someone would need to be blind not to catch up with that fact. She’ll need you in her corner. Don’t lose faith in her.” She turned around and walked to her car.

I turned to Paige. “Babe, why didn’t you tell me?”

“I knew she’d be mad at me, and I didn’t want her to be mad at you too. I thought with you by her side, she would accept help. I’m sorry, Mase.”

“If you had told me first, we could have avoided this.”

She shook her head. “If I had confided in you, you would have tried to deal with it by yourself. It’s not your job. Mel needs doctors. Even though we love her, we can only hold her hand through this.”

With Paige still sobbing in my arms, I watched the Shepards leave, my bleeding heart in fragments and my spirits sinking.

In my head, only one question remained. How can I help Melinda through this without messing it all up for both of us? Because no matter what Melinda claimed minutes ago, we weren’t done.

31

Different is a good thing

I stood on the Shepards’ front porch, pulling at the roots of my hair, not sure if I should knock or go back home. Melinda’s and my battle of words earlier had left a bruise the size of Texas in my chest. She was the last person I wanted to fight with and the last person I wanted to push away. And I succeeded at doing both earlier. Not my finest moment. Since she exposed her truth to me this morning, I’d paced like a lion in a cage every chance I got, in between comforting a dejected Paige and trying to go on with my day. Craig had no clue how to up our spirits and finally stopped trying after lunch.

I gathered my courage and knocked on the wooden door, and Mr. Shepard greeted me. “Hi, Mason.”

“How is she doing?” Did I sound as distressed as I felt? “I mean, good evening, Mr. Shepard. Can I see her?” I blew out a breath.

He opened the door wider and motioned me inside. “We met with the doctor earlier. Melinda is in her room. I’m not sure if she’ll agree to see you. She’s mad at all of us right now.”

I traced the pattern of the tiles on the floor with the tip of my shoe. “Can-can I try? I gotta talk to her. I hate how we left things earlier.”

“Sure.” He led me to his daughter’s bedroom. We both stopped in front of the closed door and exchanged a gaze before he tapped his knuckles on the panel. “Honey, Mason is here to see you. Can he come in?”

No answer.

He cracked the door open and peeked inside. “Mel?”

I heard her mumble something but couldn’t make out what she said from where I stood.

“Mason is here. Can he talk to you?”

Melinda answered something.

Mr. Shepard spun to face me. “Go ahead, son.” He patted my shoulder like his wife had done earlier.