Page 133 of Pink and Country

That’s when my episodes began. The ones where I had to spend myself physically in order to keep the peace inside me and resist doing stupid, impulsive shit.

I’d train for hours, run a marathon, or lock myself in a room for days, barely eating and sleeping, and create an entire album in just a few days, all in an attempt to put my mind at ease.

* * *

I dragged my feet to my home gym, and stripping to only my boxer briefs, I did a skipping rope workout and some weightlifting. When I turned my phone back on, I received an email from June with over two dozen links to articles about April. I rushed to the bathroom across the hallway and emptied my stomach at the sight of them. People ignored everything about us but spread all this bullshit anyway.

Whoever tipped the media off about April had something against me. The interviews with the unknown sources—which I believed were all the same person—screamed revenge. Savannah Fucking Prince. I could bet my life on it.

April was on the receiving end of all this hatred because of some stupid decision I made two years ago.

I raked my fingers through my hair and wiped my mouth using the back of my hand.

All this would annihilate April.

For the first time, I had no idea how to make things better. Not even all my money could make the story go away. My lawyers were already taking the proper steps to deal with all this, but the truth was it was already too late. There would always be traces of these lies somewhere out there. My body was sore as I made my way to the second-floor bathroom. Under scorching water, I prayed this nightmare was all a dream. My skin tingled. I swallowed the bile down my throat.

Clean, with a towel around my waist, I made my way to the laundry room and got dressed, just in time to accept June’s call.

“We’re not giving a statement yet. The PR firm is drafting one as we speak. Can you ask April to go over it and decide what she’s comfortable sharing about her marriage to Travis Benson? I’ll send the draft to you as soon as I receive it.”

“Yeah, fine.” My anger sliced through my words. “Was it Savannah?”

“We don’t know for sure. Be with April. She’ll need you.”

“Thanks.”

“And please, Carter, answer your phone when we call.”

I made my way back downstairs. I kicked a chair’s leg on the way and cursed at the pain. Hopping on one foot, massaging my aching toe, I slouched down on the couch, my insides burning like boiling lava. On my phone, I read some articles about April. Whoever did the research was thorough. There were pictures of her younger self partying, out with friends, in college, high school, and on some vacations. April didn’t have any social media account, so they had to dig further to get those. She was beautiful with her long braided silvery-blonde hair. And so young. Her eyes bore an innocence they didn’t possess anymore. But they also had this fleck of sadness that was still there nowadays. When I flipped to an image of April and Travis together, my heart tipped over in my chest. I studied them. In the picture, they smiled at each other, looking carefree. And happy. April’s baby-blue eyes sparkled. When I met her, the spark was nonexistent. Now that it had come back, I never wanted it to die out again.

Nobody would mess with my relationship. The only thing making sense in my life right now. I wouldn’t go down without a fight. The sound of April’s footsteps down the stairs triggered another wave of nausea. I steeled my back.

* * *

I held on to April as she cried her eyes out. Her tear-dam burst, and I had no clue how to patch the holes in it. When she joined me downstairs, April read me like an open book the moment our eyes met. She saw the alarm in my stare and the restlessness in my jerky movements. I explained everything the best I could, and even though I gave it my all to downplay the whole thing, she didn’t buy it. It didn’t help when Saunders called, in a panic, to make sure she was okay.

Saunders told April how bad things were without shying away from the harsh reality.

“The entire planet hates me. They want me dead, Carter. They—” Her sobs drowned the last words.

This was bad. We all knew it. People would chase her down. They would try to get her to talk. To snap pictures of her. They would make up stories to keep the buzz going. Every media outlet on the planet would gut her. They would dig out every dirt about her, her family, or the Bensons in order to keep the ship going. They would follow her every move.

My fans, the crazy ones, wanted her skinned alive.

Riley, June, the lawyers, and PR people were all on their way here to meet with us.

“We’ll fight back. Nobody messes with the people I love.”

I dried April’s eyes with the pads of my thumbs, and my lips took hers in. If I couldn’t comfort her with my words, I’d comfort her with my touch. With my love.

I’d never let anyone hurt this woman. They’d need to kill me first.

April’s mouth let me in, and my body did all the talking. We needed to connect. Deep and fast. I sensed April slipping away. No way. When everything turned to shit six years ago, I let Dahlia go. I wouldn’t make the same mistake with April. She meant everything to me. Every chunk of my heart belonged to her. I’d never be whole again without her by my side.

April had become my entire world.

The one who brightened my days and made my nights a safe haven.