Page 17 of Hard to Love

“You were not a scout. You’re paying, and I’m driving,” I say, smiling sickly sweet as I grab my purse.

“No doubt. I pick the restaurant,” he says, closing the door behind him. I open my truck door for him as I try to check out the lot. I’m hoping Hardy has left. I plop in the seat, and Hardy drives by, blowing his horn as he waves at One. We make eye contact before I can look away. Damn it.

I sulk all the way to the restaurant. One’s lost in thought, thank God. I’m really thinking about asking him his opinion; I’ll just have to do it covertly. One tells me to take Highway Seventeen so we can hit Riverside Café. Yes. Burgers and beer, I’m starved due to my weekend craziness.

“So why the long face?” One questions me as soon as the waiter walks away.

“What?” is all I can say while I play with the peanut I’m trying to assault.

“I planned to ask you to dinner tonight to celebrate your first day, but you’ve been weird all day. After the ride over here, I now know something’s up. You’ve been off for weeks, and I’m not even going to talk about the club shit. So talk.” He crosses his arms over his chest like Dad does. One is my half-brother, but my dad raised him as his. Naturally, he’s our father’s twin in so many ways.

“Alright, you asked. I started talking to someone before I graduated. He’s from around here. After a great weekend, he went weird on me. We hadn’t spoken, and then I spent the night with him after the club. That’s where I was, with him at his place. We had a disagreement and stopped talking. Seen each other Saturday night, he freaked out.” By the time I finish, I sound like I have word vomit. One sits there, taking it all in with a scowl.

“Did you sleep with him?” Stunned into silence, I stare at One until he speaks again. “Did you sleep with him, Thayer?”

“No. I wanted to; we came close, but he wouldn’t do it. What is wrong with me, Malone? Why do men find me repulsive?” He leans over the table and wipes away the tear that’s escaped. So unlike me.

“Nothing, baby girl. Men are a damn hard species to understand. We complain about women, but honestly, if we talked and were as open as women, love would be much easier. Is he your age or younger?” My big brother is the best; I really hope he’ll open his heart again someday. His ex-wife is a raving lunatic; he deserves to be happy.

“He’s older, actually. He’s a great guy; I never tried to force anything. I’m just not sure he knows he’s a good man, One. He’s had a rough life, nothing like mine. It doesn’t matter now anyway; I’m done. I was completely humiliated the other night.” I use my napkin to dab away the tears while the waiter sets our food down. One waits for him to walk away before he continues.

“What happened the other night? What was the reason he tripped out?” Glancing away, I try to decide if I’m going to do this or not. I go for it.

“We were in bed. Like, ready. I told him I’m a virgin but that I loved him and wanted to do it.” There, it’s all on the table, except for one minor detail. One doesn’t hold back; he never does.

“You should’ve had that conversation before that moment. It’s a helluva lot to lay on anyone. I hope you were safe. Who is it? And why wouldn’t I like him?” Why does he ask all these questions? Damn.

“Yes, we were safe. No, I’m not saying who it was. I know, I fucked up. I just want it to stop hurting, you know?” One nod in agreement.

“I do. Do you love him? I’m assuming you do since you were about to go as far as you were. If you do, if you think he’s worth it, show him he is. Don’t play; just don’t be easy. I don’t mean sex. Don’t let him come and go. He stays, or he isn’t worth it. Bottom line, if he bails for this shit, he’ll bail when there’s an actual shit storm.” Why doesn’t he get real with me? I agree completely.

“You’re right. He’s worth it.” I take a breath before asking, “Now, what’s up with you? And don’t blow me off, okay?” Now, he looks everywhere but at me. But he comes clean in the end.

“I met someone. She’s gorgeous. Intriguing. Drives me in-fucking-sane. She’s so hurt, nursing some serious shit. Not crazy like Monty, but like a wounded animal. Fierce but scared. I don’t know; I just can’t stay away from her, you know?” Giggling, I nod at him.

“Totally. Do I know her?” He tangles his hands in his hair like he’s pulling it out. Yeah, I’m there, brother.

“Nah, she’s new in town. Bought the little house I had been looking at, not too far from me.” He wipes his face with his hand. His hair is sticking up everywhere; it must be what I look like.

“You want to stay with me tonight? We’ll sit up and eat ice cream; you can run it off tomorrow.” We laugh as he pays the bill.

“Sounds good. You pick up the ice cream, and I’ll grab some clothes. Next time, we invite Chord. I guarantee his love life is better.” He knocks into my shoulder as we leave.

I’m doing a fantastic job of ignoring Hardy at work today. He seems to be a little uneasy. Every time I think I want to be done with him, I look at him and know I’m not. Staying outside as much as possible is a great way to avoid him. Right now, it’s for the best. One would be pissed I wasn’t honest with him. Turning off the hose, I look up to a beautiful woman walking toward me.

She introduces herself and asks about a consultation for her new home. I give her a card, and we set up a meeting. Lea asks me about the contractor here.

“He’s tough to get; I’m not sure of his workload, but he’s well worth it,” I explain to her as I look around for One. Instead, I see Hardy, so I ask him. He’s such an ass. “Hey, where’s your boss?”

“I’ll get him, hun.” Hardy gives us a wink, which just makes me angry. I side-eye Lea, and the look on her face is odd. Is he flirting with her?

“Don’t call me hun; I have a name! Use it!” Asshole. He called me hun but winked at her. Bullshit. I turn my gaze back to Lea. “This crew is the best there is around here. I’m sure they’ll get you situated.” I watch as Hardy walks around the house.

I’m showing Lea some native plants while we wait on One to come over when I hear something behind me.

“What’s up, Thayer?” We turn toward his voice, and the look on his face tells me Lea’s his girl.

“One,” Lea says. One answers with a smile like I’ve never seen on him before.