Page 61 of Unfettered

“I refuse to go back into the box you shoved me in.”

“I don’t think we ever really left that room.”

Words from the only two men I’ve ever loved swirl around and around in my head, and the pain in my chest cannot be attributed to my surgery or injury, but rather the breaking of my own heart.

“Love is a weakness. Your father died because he let that bitch poison him.”

“An heir is the only good, normal thing you’ve ever done.”

“You’re weak. Useless. Just like your father before you. I should have killed you.”

Closing my eyes, I try my best to beat my uncle’s voice back.

“You are not his. And even if you were, you will still always be mine.”

The only reason I even survived my childhood was because of Tennant, and I fucked up that relationship too. And for what? Because I let my power, my control, my understanding of what was right and wrong as a Boss take over?

“You always say you don’t want to be your uncle, but I'm sorry to say, Amore, you’ve failed.”

The lessons I was taught, that Allesandro was taught, run deep within both of us. We were shaped to be the leaders, the authority, the be-all end-all of our respective Families.

In the end, we became shells of the people we were always supposed to be, and instead, we allowed the ones who sought to break us to win.

But Allesandro is changing that. My love is growing, learning, becoming a better person, and he has earned his spot in this Council.

While I have been left behind.

It’s nothing less than what I deserve.

Before I can spiral further down the path of wallowing in the mistakes I’ve made, and the guilt of single-handedly destroying my family, there’s a knock on my hospital room door. It’s pushed open a moment later and Roman walks in, a covered plate in his hands.

“You okay?” he asks right away.

I try to take a deep breath, focus my thoughts again, but all I get is pain for my efforts.

He hurries across the room, setting the plate aside and fussing over me as I shift uncomfortably in the bed. “Hold still, dammit. Doc is already stressed. He’ll be pissed if you hurt yourself more.”

I grimace as I settle once more. “Sorry, Figlio Mio. You don’t have to worry about me.” Though it makes me happy you are. It means I haven’t lost you completely yet.

Roman huffs and takes a seat in the chair Atticus just vacated. “Yes, well, I will. You’re still my parent, even if you piss me off.”

I huff a laugh, appreciating his honesty.

“Sorry I wasn’t here earlier. We had a long meeting, and I was exhausted from the day before, so Lio let me sleep in a little this morning before we had to get to work.”

“Don’t worry about it. I know you’re busy. You don’t have to spend all your time catering to me.”

Roman sniffs but doesn’t comment, reaching for the plate. “Allesandro made pastries. I honestly don’t know where he finds the time, but I brought you some.”

“Thank you.” I look down at the plain croissant, cranberry muffin, and apricot cornetto. Fuck, my heart really has my number, and I adore him for it.

Roman shrugs like it wasn’t a big deal, but we both know better. With how hurt he was by my actions, I know how important this gesture is.

“I’m sorry,” I say lowly.

Roman’s dark green eyes meet mine, wide and full of hope…and devastation.

My heart clenches as the guilt rises again, knowing I ruined our relationship, and for what? Because I thought I knew better than he did? Because I tried to have control over his life, and his relationships, when he’s an adult and can make his own choices? Has been making choices about who he wants to spend his life with since he was nineteen.