Page 18 of Bear My Heart

Shanti, both dismayed and delighted, said, "One of each?" and Imelda smiled serenely at her.

"I heard him. Anything else?"

"Coffee!" Shanti blurted. "Lots of coffee, to cut all that sugar! Oh my God! Do you think I'm too skinny, or something?"

Imelda, who had the soul of a busybody grandmother, said, "Yes," which made Shanti laugh as Peter took the box of doughnuts and paid. Shanti got the coffees, and they retreated to a table with their goodies. Peter popped the box open, selected an old-fashioned, and ate the entire thing in two enormous bites, his eyes closed blissfully as he chewed.

"You're right," he finally mumbled before taking a swig of coffee. "Those are amazing. And since you asked, no."

"No?" Shanti dithered over what doughnut to take and finally selected a glazed twist that was still warm. She bit into it, groaned happily, and found her own eyes closing with the same bliss Peter had shown. "Oh, those really are good."

"They're amazing. I'm glad I bought…" Peter paused and Shanti opened her eyes to find him counting them. "Thirteen, including the two we're eating. A baker's dozen. No, I don't think you're too skinny. I think you're perfect."

Shanti's face heated, but she couldn't stop herself from smiling into her coffee cup. "Then why do you keep feeding me?"

"I'm too skinny," Peter said just before inhaling a second doughnut.

"You are not! You're gor—" It was too late to pull the compliment back, even if Shanti never said anything like that to…well, anybody. Even if just a couple of days ago she'd been unable to imagine herself as someone who would ever say something like that. But now she had, right out loud and everything. Face even hotter than before, she finished the word in a whisper. "Gorgeous."

Warm spots appeared in Peter's cheeks. "Thanks. I don't get that a lot."

"I don't know why," Shanti mumbled. "Anybody with eyes could see it."

"Maybe it takes the right eyes," Peter murmured.

A strange, half-painful hope leaped in Shanti's heart, so intense that she had to close her eyes again and try to breathe through it. After a moment, Peter, now sounding worried, said, "Shanti?" very quietly.

She managed to open her eyes and tried to smile at him, though it felt a little wet and shaky around the edges. "I'm fine. I don't know why, but…"

But being the right person for you sounds like the best thing that's ever happened to me. That was what Shanti wanted to say, but she'd only met Peter Baranov a few days earlier, and he wasn't going to be in town very long. And she was pretending she wouldn't be, either. So she couldn't just go around saying outrageous things.

Except, she thought, except this might be my one chance. Shanti had literally never done anything outrageous in her life. What better time to try, than with someone she knew was leaving? For a heartbeat, courage filled her and she drew a breath to speak…

…and just as quickly, all that courage fled. She wasn't the kind of person who said or did spontaneous things, even with a man who made her as comfortable as Peter did. She ended up giving him another weak smile and shaking her head.

His brown eyes were full of soft compassion, and his smile was the gentlest, kindest thing she'd seen in a long time. "I'd like to say something, but I don't want to overstep any boundaries."

"Oh, somebody should," Shanti whispered hoarsely. "I'm too tied up with mine."

Peter's eyes softened even more, his smile turning to a chuckle before he put his hand out, palm up. "I get the idea you've spent so long taking care of other people you're not used to being seen," he said gently. "I want to say I see you, but I also don't want to terrify you by seeing you."

"The mortifying ordeal of being perceived," Shanti mumbled. "You're not wrong. I'm not really used to being noticed. But you don't scare me. I just don't know what to do with it." She put her hand on top of Peter's carefully, like she thought his fingers might bite her or something.

They didn't bite, but the warmth of his big rough calloused fingers sent a tingling shock through her that was almost more intense than a bite. Her whole body felt alight, felt alive in a way she wasn't used to, and for a moment she clung to that feeling, holding Peter's hand like he was a lifeline. He curled his fingers around hers, not quite dwarfing her hand, but making her feel more delicate than usual, and she shivered again as he brushed his thumb over the back of her hand.

"You don't have to do anything with it, if you don't want to." Peter brushed his thumb over her hand again, gaze fastening on the motion before he looked up. "I just want you to know I'll…"

Shanti had the distinct feeling he meant to finish that sentence by saying he would wait for her. On one hand, that was silly: they were both right there. On the other, he was obviously sensitive to her tendency toward being cautious and reserved, and didn't want to go overboard.

And on the third, they'd met three days ago and it was probably a bit much to be saying things like I'll wait for you on such short acquaintance. But the air between them was nearly electric with possibility, and Shanti's breath kept disappearing into hope. She bit her lip, lowering her eyes to their entwined hands, and whispered, "That'd be nice."

Peter's fingers squeezed hers and she heard a smile come into his voice. "Then I will. Now, not to be rude, but are you going to finish that glazed twist?"

Shanti yelped and pulled her hand back to grab her doughnut and clutch it against her chest protectively as she eyed Peter. "Yes!" Just to make it clear she meant it, she shoved about half the twist into her mouth and bit off an enormous bite. Somehow a bit of melting glaze went up her nose, and she coughed, then covered her mouth to hide both a laugh and the huge mouthful of doughnut the laugh was exposing. Peter grinned at her as her eyes watered from too big a bite, and she flapped her hand at him while trying to get a sip of coffee to moisten all that sweet fluffy dough.

When she'd finally cleared her mouth enough to speak again, she rasped, "I don't know how you ate one of those in two bites," and Peter held up one of the ring-shaped old-fashioneds.

"First, I have a bigger mouth than you do, and second, this is about half the size of a twist. I'm sure I could eat one of those in two bites, but it'd be more of a challenge. A little bit more of one. So tell me what the plan for today is?"