Page 266 of Spring Guardians & Songbirds

“I will,” he said, stealing a glance at his devastated brother.

The fog grew back denser the further away we moved from the lake, pulling back in place as if we’d never even stepped there. Though I was glad to leave the creeping place where I'd made some of the memories that would turn to nightmares for years to come, something in it pulled my attention back.

Unable to resist the call to my magic, I glanced over my shoulder, searching the black mist till my eyes landed on a tall figure clad in piercing white cloths with pale glistening skin, the bluest of eyes and long, straight white hair that bellowed in the air even though there was no wind. There was no man I’d ever seen with his beauty besides Kilian. His sight was otherworldly. At first, I thought the ancient fog or the shock was still playing games with my sanity. Until the man smirked and crossed an arm to his chest before bowing to me and vanishing out of sight between a gust of wind.

Chapter forty

Electrum

Kilian

Cicadas serenaded the world as if they didn’t know their only spectator tonight was I. The gardens were littered with joyous flower folk, night spirits and fireflies dancing excitedly at the lack of human interruption.

Despite their call to join the joy the blessed night brought upon this land and its creatures, I couldn’t rejoice. Not when I couldn't think of anything but the last look of the woman who made my heartbeat pulse, made it want to stop altogether.

“You were right,” Snow’s soft voice came from behind me. “The Adriatian night sky is something of a wonder.”

It took me a moment to process that the sound was not of my imagination. I spun around in my seat to see her approach me. She wore red and gold. The bright ruby fabric floated in the air at the touch of the spring breeze permeating the gardens and the gilded jewellery glistened under the white moonlight. She was divine in every sense, but today, she looked more than otherworldly. Tonight, she’d become a true god after claiming Myrdur from her father’s reign—after she’d set the land and its suffering souls free from him. Tonight, Olympia celebrated her and their blessing.

“What are you doing here, my love?” I asked, lowering my tumbler on the ground. “Did the festivities end early?”

She nodded and came to me, perching herself in my lap and wrapping her hands around my neck. “Mine never started. Why didn’t you come? What is a pretty queen without her pretty king?”

I wanted to take those words for more than what they were. I wanted to wrap my hands around her and pull her close to me. “I know where I am not wanted.”

Her brows bunched together, and she searched for something in my eyes. Those golden rings pacing rapidly before she lowered her fiery red mouth on mine.

She kissed me and I couldn't get enough of her. Why did she kiss me?

“Would you like to hear a story?” she asked, weaving a hand through my hair and brushing it away from my eyes.

I nodded and she let out a soft sigh before turning her attention above us, toward the endless starry skies. “When I was younger, Eren let me play with him and a few of his friends. Hide and seek. I made it my goal to be the last one found so I went and hid where I knew no one could find me—in the winter garden maze.” She looked down at her bare feet that wiggled from under the long fabric of her dress. “As you probably might have guessed, I did go barefooted. Except, this time I spent not minutes outside, but half a day. My mother found me almost frozen. I hadn’t seen her in weeks.” Her voice shivered a little and I damned all gods and clutched her tight to me. “But she came for me, worried and upset. My feet were pretty bad after standing on the frosted ground for so long, so they brought leeches to get the dried blood out. It was the most disgusting and uncomfortable thing I’d ever done as a six-year-old, but I loved every minute of it because my mother stood by me and looked after me. It wasn’t long, though, till she was gone again. So, I fled for the gardens one more time, hid and stayed in the cold till I almost blacked out and she found me, again. She stayed and looked after me this time, too. But then I did it again and again till she got tired of my trick and called me out on it.” She looked at me. “I was a horrible child.”

My insides ripped apart. “You deserve to be loved more than just when you are in pain. Nothing about that makes you horrible.”

She nodded and cleared her throat. “I tried to explain myself to her. That I wasn’t being disobedient like everyone called me to be. I told her that I missed her so fiercely my heart hurt. That I couldn’t explain to her why I was doing what I did. She taught me a new term that day. Heartache. That is what she told what I felt was. An ache so fierce for someone you love. She told me someone could become your heartache. It manifests itself like a sickness.”

“You miss her.”

“I do, my heartache.” Her words were a whisper, so light and feathery and magnificent that I thought I might have made them up till she said, “And I miss you. I miss you so much, even when I have you near me. You make my heart hurt so fiercely.” She rested her forehead on mine. “I love you. I’ve loved you and I love you. And I've done it so horribly—I’ve loved you so horribly. I love you, Kil. So much.”

If I didn’t hear it again, I’ll think I imagined them.

Tears began streaking down her cheeks. “Say something.” Her eyes searched for mine. “Please.”

I wiped her tears away. “Say it again.”

She frowned. “Say something or please?”

I laughed. “That you love me.”

“I love you,” she repeated.

“Again.”

“I love you.”

Gods. I never knew till now that I’d been holding my breath since the day I’d met her. I didn’t know I hadn’t breathed since then because now I actually felt my lungs fill with air. “Since when?” I had to know. I had to know that she was not saying it prompted by yesterday’s panic.