Page 76 of Letting Go at 40

A warm smile spreads my face as I step up to her, eager to honor her request. To give her the kiss I’ve been longing to give her since the moment I arrived. With every hesitant glance and caught look, I’ve wanted to pull her close and take what I desire. Still, I’ve understood her caution.

Her kids. Our friends. Would they understand? Would they appreciate the undeniable attraction between Anna and me?

None of that seems to matter as we stand here kissing like her house isn’t full of people.

When the door suddenly opens, we jerk apart. Chests heaving. Hearts racing. Autumn stands with a hand on the doorknob.

“Just wanted to make sure you kids were playing nicely but I see you’re getting along just fine.” Her head tilts. Confusion is written in Ben’s little sister’s expression.

I glance at Anna, whose skin has paled. She steps toward Autumn. “I can explain.”

Can she? Can she clarify what this is between us? Can she admit there is something between us?

“It’s not what you think,” she says.

The fire lit by desperate kisses douses to sizzled embers. My eyes catch on Autumn’s a second, wanting to deny what Anna has said. It’s exactly what Autumn thought. I was kissing Anna. Her widowed sister-in-law.

Autumn breaks eye contact with me and stares at Anna, soft, but hurt. However, her tone doesn’t hold condemnation when she says, “Looked to me like you were kissing each other.”

Anna hangs her head like an errant teen caught making out on the couch with her boyfriend when she should have been babysitting. Only I’m not her boyfriend and we hadn’t made it to the couch.

Running my fingers through my hair, I tug at the back.

Autumn lays a hand on her growing belly and looks at me. “Do you mind giving Anna and me a minute?” Her voice softens as she gazes at me with the love of a younger sister and the caution of a friend.

“Take all the minutes,” I quip, rushing past her without a glance back at Anna.

Anna who just shut that door that I was hoping was open just enough to let light out and me in.

Chapter 28

9 Months Ago

December

Letting Go

[Anna]

Tears fill my eyes.

Not only was my libido soaring but I’d been caught by my sister-in-law kissing her brother’s best friend. A friend who was like a brother to Ben.

Closing my eyes, I will away the tears at the disappointment in the kiss ending and the upset at being caught kissing Mason.

“I don’t know what to say,” I admit once Mason storms out and Autumn closes the door.

“Then don’t talk. Just listen.” Autumn steps closer and takes my hand, tugging me toward the couch. We sit beside one another but I can’t look at her even while she holds my hand in hers.

“I loved Ben,” she begins. “He was the best brother anyone could ask for. He was kind, protective and included me even when I was a pain in the ass.”

Weakly, I smile at the truth. Being four years younger than us, the guys didn’t always love Autumn’s inclusion, but Ben never wanted Autumn to feel left out.

“And I know you loved Ben,” she continues.

I sigh at her declaration.

Autumn squeezes my fingers. “But Ben is gone. He isn’t coming back. He’d want you to live, Anna.”