Page 115 of Letting Go at 40

“Mason?” His name is confusion. He’s brought me to orgasm more than once in a night but this . . . I never come twice with penetration. Still, I climb, and I claw, and the tension creeps up my center again.

“Fuck. Anna. Fuck my cock like that, sweetness.”

My arm slips around his shoulder, and I cling to him as I grunt and moan, tossing my body up and down over his until his fingers find that sensitive nub. My breath catches and I silently scream as I break over him once more.

Only, Mason grabs my hips, moving me with the bucking of his hips until he stills, pulsing inside me, filling me.

Our eyes catch. He isn’t wearing a condom this time. His breathing seems to heighten as realization hits him, but he doesn’t stop. He juts and jolts within me as I ride out the unraveling of me around him. Then he’s capturing my mouth and kissing me hard, holding onto the moment before reality hits.

Suddenly, I’m crying silent tears. When the salty liquid hits my lips, I pull back, hanging my head.

“Hey,” Mason whispers, tipping up my chin. “What’s this?”

“We didn’t use a condom and I’m not on the pill.”

“Anna.” My name is a tender caress as his fingers brush back my still wet hair. “I’m clean, baby. Okay? You’re safe with me.”

Safe from pregnancy? I’m forty-two. Then it hits me. Today is my birthday. I’m forty-three.

And more tears flow. The fear of another child isn’t really the issue. I’m just overwhelmed. This night. This day. Mason.

He’s kissing my chin and my jaw. My cheeks and my closed eyes. “It’s okay, baby. Talk to me.”

Instead, I kiss him, keeping it slow and soft. Eventually, Mason pulls back, pressing his forehead to mine. “Too much?”

Maybe that’s just the thing, none of it was too much. It was everything I’d been waiting for, more than I should ask for, and afraid what’s next is settling in.

“Did you mean it?” he asks, his voice quiet, directed at my lips with our heads still together. “Earlier, you said you were mine.”

Did I mean it? I hate that I pause but then I nod. “I’m yours as long as you’re mine.”

“Anything for you, sweetheart.”

Then he’s kissing me again, sealing us together.

Chapter 40

4 Months Ago

May

Turning Points

[Anna]

Mason drops me off at my front door like it’s a regular date. He kisses me long and slow, taking his time not to miss a curve or corner of my mouth.

“Night, beautiful,” he finally says with a kiss to the tip of my nose. He waits until I enter the house and close the door before he crosses the driveway to the garage.

My hair is still wet but tucked into a messy bun at the back of my neck. Bryce is obviously home, as evidenced by the pile of dirty dishes in the sink. That kid can eat.

I chuckle as I head down the dark hallway to my bedroom, but there I pause just inside the door.

I stare at the bed.

Ben did not pass away in this bedroom. He asked to be moved upstairs, claiming he’d have a better view above the tree line surrounding the lake. The excuse was lame, but Ben was weak, and I didn’t wish to argue with him. He took a guest room in the corner, that overlooks River’s backyard from one window and the lake through the back.

The room has been cleaned and painted and restored to a guest bedroom with a new look.