Page 203 of Lose You Twice

“Has anybody⁠—”

“Behind the couch,” Lily says.

He looks at her. “How do you know?”

“I put it there after I almost fell on it.”

Normally, I’d laugh, but my mind is still reeling.

“Here, how about this…” She reaches for her keys. “I’ll take them to school, then do my errands. That way, you can take your time and get ready for class. Okay?”

I shake my head. “No, it’s fine. I can⁠—”

She rests a hand on my shoulder. “I’ve got it, honey. Take your time getting ready, and we’ll talk when you get home. Not just about this, but I needed to talk to you later today anyway.”

Warning bells start going off, but my head is already too full to understand what they mean. “I can take them.”

“I know you can, Wren. I’ve never questioned that for a second,” she says, urging the girls toward the door. “Let me have this one, okay?” Mom looks back toward the stairs.

“Justin! Are you riding with us or walking?”

“I’m coming, I’m coming,” he says, bounding down the stairs. “Holden isn’t in his room.”

I nod numbly. “He got picked up early to hit weights before school.”

Mom smiles softly. “Of course he did. Drive safe, and I’ll see you later.”

I muster a small smile as they all file out, and I’m left alone in the house.

I head upstairs, intending to take a long, hot shower. Instead, I sit on my bed and open my laptop.

I’ve already googled my symptoms countless times, but I never went farther than seeing what could possibly be the reason behind them. I didn’t know which trail to follow, just the general ideas of what could be causing them.

Now I have a new path to research.

Endometrioma.

The first result tells me exactly what Mom already did. An ovarian cyst commonly associated with endometriosis.

Associated.

There’s that fucking word again.

I open another article. Then another.

I tell myself I’m being responsible because I stick to major hospital systems and medical organizations.

That makes absolutely no difference to my ability to catastrophize.

Pelvic pain. Painful periods. Pain during sex. Irregular cycle.

I’ve had enough of those symptoms that every paragraph feels increasingly personal.

Going back to the main search, I’m about to stop reading when one article catches my eye.

Endometriosis and Fertility.

I click the article and start skimming what it says.