Page 64 of Love Limits

Fact: Ash wanted sex.

Fact: Zhong didn’t want sex.

Fact: Ash wanted age play.

Hypothesis: Zhong probably didn’t like age play.

Fact: Ash wanted puppy play.

Observation: Zhong needed to do research on puppy play.

Hypothesis: Zhong probably didn’t like puppy play either.

Observation: Sometimes Zhong thought he was acting like Ash thought a Daddy should act.

Question: Was he acting like a Daddy?

That led him to a new line of reasoning.

Fact: Ash had been in poly relationships and didn’t get jealous.

Fact: Zhong had been in poly relationships and didn’t get jealous.

Hypothesis: Ash and Zhong could have a poly relationship together.

Fact: Zhong wanted someone who loved him most of all.

Fact: Ash wanted someone who loved them most of all.

Fact: Ash wanted someone who shared their kinks.

Conclusion: Zhong couldn’t be Ash’s primary partner.

Hypothesis: Zhong might be able to be Ash’s secondary partner.

Question: Would being Ash’s secondary partner and Dustin’s primary partner be enough?

That was where it kind of all fell apart. Well it gave him three questions, and several hypotheses to investigate.

But the facts didn’t get any better on paper than when Zhong swam through them in his head. Ash wanted someone to be their primary Daddy, and Zhong couldn’t be that.

If Zhong tried doing something romantic with them and it didn’t work out, the possibilities for how badly that could end almost made him nauseous. He didn’t even consider trying to be their primary—they’d never sign up for a romantic, asexual, vanilla relationship.

So it was much better to keep things non-romantic. That would be much easier. And he still wasn’t quite sure what the difference was anyway.

The whole exercise was depressing. Instead of feeling warm, that place in Zhong’s chest felt hard and tight. Almost like it hurt to breathe.

He’d known all of the parts before, but it was so much worse seeing it on paper.

Like it was irrevocable.

Zhong put his notebook back in his pocket because he didn’t want to see it. Then he pushed the cart around, trying to think of what else he needed.

He ended up in the ice cream aisle, which he’d recently become much more familiar with. Against his will, a small smile rose to his face.

Ice cream made Ash happy, and giving Ash ice cream made Zhong happy.

Ash was still coming over tonight. So really nothing had changed.