Page 85 of The Beta Test

31415: Do you really think Dan would have known what pi was? Or given you killer life advice?

80085 [Me]: Good point.

80085 [Me]: Are you done with your project yet?

31415: What project?

80085 [Me]: The one you’re ‘tweaking’...

31415: Ah. Almost done.

April

Me: If someone told you they were ‘tweaking’ a project before they would agree to meet in person, what would that mean to you?

Analiese: Is this some kind of psych exam question?

Me: Why would you think that?

Analiese: I don’t know. I’m studying for AP psychology right now, so maybe that’s why.

Me: You’re taking AP psych and AP art history?? No wonder you’re valedictorian.

Me: Congrats on that, btw. I saw the announcement.

Analiese: Thanks.

Me: Can you answer my question now?

Analiese: Look, I don’t know. Maybe they’re embarrassed about something and want to resolve it before you see them? Like losing weight or getting a nose job.

Me: What?? You can be so dark sometimes.

Analiese: My original thought was that they were in prison and needed to finish their sentence, but then I realized this was likely about Connection Services and so had to be something more practical for our student body.

Analiese: I know of at least 3 girls at school that have had nose jobs.

Analiese: I personally don’t care, but there’s a girl on cross country who talks about that kind of stuff all the time and I can’t help but overhear it. Just to clarify.

Me: I mean, I guess that’s possible. Not prison, but the other ideas.

Me: This is a guy though.

Analiese: I know of at least one guy that’s had a nose job.

Me: Nevermind.

31415: Are you going to prom?

80085 [Me]: Of course! Aren’t you? Or maybe you can’t because you’re a freshman…

31415: I’m not a freshman.

80085 [Me]: I would know that if we actually met.

80085 [Me]: Are you getting plastic surgery?

80085 [Me]: IMO beauty comes in all sizes and shapes, just so you know. True beauty is in the heart and I’m not judgey.