Page 15 of Choosing Goddess

“What?” she asked, setting her phone down and tilting her head to look at me.

“What do you mean, what?”

“What bothered you?”

“Nothing is bothering me, Spy. Why would you say that?”

“Because I’m leaning against you and I can feel how tense you are. Because I’m almost positive, I heard you clench your jaw so impossibly tight that I think your back teeth broke. So, I’m asking again. What? What happened? What made you tense like that?”

“Really, nothing. It’s nothing.”

She sat up, putting the blanket on her lap and turned to face me, a brow raised.

“I’m calling bullshit, Ajax. I don’t want to deal with lying right now, so let’s make a rule that we’ll be honest with each other. Tell me what’s going on in that head of yours. Because it is evident something is.

“And I don’t like to be the type to guess, but I will. If I do, I also believe neither one of us will like what happens after that.”

“Fine, you accepted that request.”

“You’re right, I did. You saw I did, obviously.”

“It’s a request.”

“It was, yes. You’re very smart, Ajax. It was a simple day lunch request. What’s your problem with it?”

“It’s a request for you to go on a date with another man.”

“First of all, it’s my job and I’m not quitting my job. Second, it’s not a date, because it’s my job. I’m not the same person when I do these things as I am with you.”

She paused, crossing her arms over her chest as she cocked a brow.

“Are you saying you’re pissed because I said yes?”

“Yes,” I said, getting up off the swing and running my hand through my dark hair. I could easily see this derailing in the worst way, but I couldn’t stop myself. I was upset that she said yes and honestly, I didn’t have the right. I knew it.

But do you ever have those moments where you know something and still do it?

That was this moment.

My mouth was still going when it should have stopped.

“Look, Ajax,” she said, standing up as well. “It’s really sweet that you think you have any control over this right now or that you think your say matters, but it’s complete and utter bullshit. You don’t, by the way, so it’s best just so suck it up and get that in your head.”

I stared at her, lifting a brow.

“You’re going on it anyway?”

“Uh, yeah. Why wouldn’t I?”

“Because I’m asking you not to.”

“No, Ajax, you’re not asking, you’re telling me and I don’t do well with that.” She crossed her arms, her face telling me I should really just sit back down and try to salvage this morning, but it wasn’t happening.

“Spy,” I started but she held her hand up.

“You need to save it. What you need to understand is this, I am my own woman and I’m not giving my job up for just anyone. Especially for a man that doesn’t see me as anything more than a friend at the moment.”

“Hey now, that’s not fair. Just because we don’t have a label doesn’t mean that’s all I see you as.”