Page 7 of Dare to be Wicked

Oh, mon Dieu.

Chapter 3

Dear diary,

It is so lovely to be back at Holbrook. All the Adolphus family are here. I do like Fred very much, for we are about the same age and he never treats me like he thinks me a silly girl, and little Harry is so funny. He adores me—naturally—and it is wonderful to be among friends. I do hope Lady Helena and Gabriel come too, though papa says there is some urgent problem with the laying of their railway line, and they may need to postpone their visit. I hope not, for I was looking forward to seeing Florence, Evie and Felix, and—I suppose—Emmeline too, for she is my best friend. Even if she is an insufferable know-it-all.

Today we met some friends of Cassius. A Mr Demarteau and his brother, who is a Count. The Comte de Villen. Isn’t it a marvellous name? Like a wicked seducer in a Gothic novel. He looks wicked too. No man that handsome can be entirely good. I do hope not anyway, for I want there to be some excitement over the holidays. There must be a romance, perhaps a scandal too. Nothing truly horrid, only the exciting kind where everything works out in the end. Mama says I must not read Mrs Radcliffe again until I am older, for I am precocious and will turn out to be a dreadful creature and go to the devil if she does not keep me in hand. I think she is teasing me.

Everyone believes Cassius will ask Eliza to marry him, but I don’t think Eliza wants to. At least, if she does, she ought not to have blushed so when she was introduced to Mr Demarteau. Lottie though, my word, if she doesn’t have a care and stop gazing at Cassius like he’s the last cream cake in the entire world, everyone will know she’s in love with him. Everyone but him, likely, for my sister Phoebe says men are remarkably slow to notice such things.

I cannot wait to grow up and fall in love. I hope that it will be romantic and exciting and something we can tell our children like the duchess wrote Mama and Papa’s story in The Eagle and the Lamb. They think I have not read it but I have. It is all very well reading about it in books, though, but to live it… Well, I am certainly too young, even I know that, so I must content myself with watching everyone else. I shall tell you everything too, of course. Fear not.

Oh, what a summer it will be!

―Excerpt of an entry to the diary of Lady Catherine ‘Cat’ Barrington, youngest daughter of the Marquess and Marchioness of Montagu.

30th June 1838, Holbrook House, Sussex.

Lottie made her way down to the breakfast parlour, relieved to discover she was among the first to rise. Usually Eliza beat her to it, but her sister had been in a strange mood last night, oddly distracted. At dinner, Lottie had found she’d had to repeat the same question three times before she could gain a sensible answer, which was most unlike Eliza. Apparently she’d had a headache. If Eliza admitted she had a headache, that likely meant she had the most appalling megrim, for the woman would never utter a word that would cause anyone else any trouble or discomfort. She was far too good. It was a little sickening sometimes.

“Oh, Cassius!” Lottie exclaimed with delight, immediately cursing herself for making such a fuss about finding him alone at the breakfast table. Of course he’d be here. He lived here, did he not?

For a moment he stilled, giving her a look she could not decipher. Most likely he was wishing her to the devil, for she would spoil his quiet breakfast. He’d looked to be deep in thought as she’d come in, after all, and now she was so giddy with nerves she would not be able to stop herself from babbling. Mama always said she had tongue enough for two sets of teeth when she was anxious. Besides, Cassius must preferred Eliza’s quiet calm to Lottie’s chaos if they were to marry. Eliza had always spent the time they were all together trying to evade her sister. It had been most unfair, too, for she’d only wanted to their company. Well, his company.

He stood as she entered, smiling politely. “Good morning, Lottie. This is an unexpected pleasure. What are you doing up so early?”

“Oh, well, the sun came streaming through the window this morning and I simply could not stay in bed when it was such a beautiful day. There is so much I want to do, and I cannot decide what to do first. Which of course means I shall drift about doing nothing at all and driving everyone quite mad while I demand to know what they are doing, and can I join in?” Lottie snapped her mouth shut, aware she had done precisely as she feared, and let her wretched tongue run away with her. She shot Cassius a nervous glance to see if he looked annoyed, but there was an arrested expression on his face she could not read. Probably he was stunned at quite how irritating she could be in such a short space of time.

She flashed him a grateful smile as he pulled out the chair beside him and made a promise to herself to keep her blasted mouth shut. He settled back to his breakfast and, once he was occupied, Lottie glanced at him from beneath her eyelashes. Her heart squeezed in her chest. Good Lord, it was so unfair that a man be as beautiful as that. It hurt to look at him. What chance did a girl have when a fellow went about looking like that? It should be made law that he carry a warning sign about his neck advising impressionable young ladies to keep their distance.

Why had her mother not kept them apart? She was usually such a sensible woman. Had she failed to notice her friend’s son had become a temptation beyond bearing? Beauty like that was dangerous. It had to be.

Her gaze drifted back to him. The sun that streamed into the bright room glinted on his blond hair and highlighted a strong, square jaw. He had a little cleft in his chin, and those beautiful eyes were thickly lashed and—oh, those magnificent shoulders.

She sighed.

Well, he could hardly be surprised if one fell in love with him, could he? Would he be surprised, she wondered? Would he care? Or would he laugh and think her a silly little chit? The idea made her cheeks heat. No doubt she appeared naïve and gauche compared to all the girls he’d met on his travels. She knew he’d spent time in Paris, after all, and she could only imagine how the sophisticated French women had reacted to his masculine beauty. No doubt they’d have climbed over each other to get to him. She pushed the thought away as jealousy stirred.

“It is a lovely day,” Cassius said, breaking into her thoughts. “And I expect Mother has made plans to entertain you all, so you need not fear being bored. She is quite adept at telling you what it is you wish to do. Strangely, she is usually correct, too.”

“I like your mama,” Lottie said, making a valiant effort to stop swooning and sighing and eat something. It wasn’t easy. Determinedly, she reached for a fresh bread roll and concentrated on the conversation. “She’s always been very kind and welcoming to us, though she’s awfully intimidating. I’m sure she thinks me an utter ninny.”

Cassius laughed, a deep rich sound that so delighted her she dropped the roll and it bounced off her plate and onto the floor. “Oh, drat!”

A footman leapt forward and swept the roll up before offering Lottie another. Oh, elegantly done, Lottie dear. She cringed, not daring to meet Cassius’s eye. No wonder he wanted to marry Eliza. She would never do something so horribly embarrassing as juggle her breakfast. Still, at least her perfect sister had not been here to see it. Small mercies.

“She really doesn’t.”

Lottie looked up, a little perplexed.

“My mother doesn’t think you a ninny.”

“Well, a good job she was not here this morning, or she’d likely change her mind,” Lottie said with a bright smile, though her stomach was tight. What was she playing at? She ought to have run in the other direction the moment she found Cassius here alone. As if she hadn’t made a spectacle enough of herself yesterday when she’s seen him for the first time. Not that she’d meant to. Lottie had meant to show him how she’d grown into an elegant young lady like her sister, well-mannered and sophisticated, but her heart had other ideas. The moment she’d seen him she’d wanted to burst with joy, and it had all escaped her, bubbling up in an embarrassing show of adoration that Cassius had clearly found excruciatingly embarrassing. She’d put him so far out of countenance he’d been dumbstruck, and he had barely met her eye ever since. No doubt that was why Eliza had been so distant and out of sorts last night, too. Why would she not be when her own sister made such a fool of herself over the man she intended to marry? The idea made Lottie’s stomach twist.

“Lottie?”

She blinked, realising too late she’d been staring miserably at her plate without saying a word.