Page 53 of Beneath the Quiet

“In foster care.”

“Back in Dublin?”

“Yes.” I tuck a lock of hair behind her ear. “I still keep in touch with my foster parents.” I hesitate, wondering if sharing more is too much for such a young girl to take in. “One day, I’ll tell you more, but I just want you to know that I don’t think you have anything to feel guilty about, okay? We can’t force ourselves to miss anyone just to please someone we do know and love. No matter what, your feelings are your own, and you shouldn’t have to apologise for them.”

She takes a shaky breath, tugging at my heartstrings.

“I’ll try.” She smiles at me, and relief washes over me.

“Good. Now, what about that tour, eh?”

As she takes my hand again, she grins wider, and I breathe a small sigh of relief now that the crisis is over. She pulls me along behind her and first shows me where her chickens are. Then she brings me all the way down a long and narrow lane until we reach the greenhouses.

“They’re actually called polytunnels, but I like the word greenhouse more,” Katie confesses on a smile. “But Dad tells me I’d best learn farm lingo properly.”

“And I stand by that.”

I jump at the sound of Aidan’s voice close behind and turn my head. My stomach does that flip again the moment I catch sight of him striding towards us in his overalls and dark-green wellies. I’m so over this attraction to him, but I can’t seem to switch it off. I scrutinise his face as he comes closer, satisfied when I don’t see any sadness lingering in his eyes. I’m not sure how to read the mild politeness there or the lack of his signature crooked smile.

I’m not even sure if I’d prefer the sadness over the distance.

Aidan lifts his hand as if to touch me but changes his mind at the last moment before he reaches my side and lets his arms fall again. I shouldn’t miss a touch I haven’t even felt yet, but I do. I won’t let him see it, and especially not after my chat with his daughter, but something tells me that I have to share what Katie told me without betraying her trust in me.

“Katie, love, can you head over to the rabbits and get them fed now, please?”

“Okay.”

I watch Katie as she runs off, out of earshot, before I give Aidan my undivided attention.

“Are you okay?”

He shakes his head. “Don’t miss much, do you, Detective?”

“It’s kind of my job, not missing things.”

“Right, right.” He clucks his tongue. “I’m okay, but thanks for asking.”

I know now’s not the time to push him, but I can’t give him the out he wants. He needs to know what his daughter trusted enough in me to share.

“Katie told me about her mother. I’m so very sorry, Aidan.”

His lips part on a shuddering sigh. “That was quick. She must like you.”

“I hope so.”

“It’s not a secret, though. Tierney died when Katie came into the world, and I’ve been her only parent since then. My parents helped a lot. Still do, actually.”

“I admire you.”

He drags a hand over his face and then jams his hands in his pockets. “Please, don’t. I’m just doing the best I can for my girl.”

I cross my arms and take a step closer towards him. “You stayed, Aidan. You fought through the grief and became what you needed to be for Katie. My parents abandoned me when I was a baby. They took the easy way out and left me at the stairs to the hospital in the dead of night. They didn’t care enough to bang on the fucking door before they took off. They were cowards, plain and simple.”

Aidan winces. “Maeve…”

“That’s why I admire you. You stuck with your precious girl when she needed you the most, and I may not know you that well yet, but I know you’ll keep doing that for her whenever and wherever life takes her. I recognise a good man when I see him, Aidan.” I take another step closer and tilt my head back to keep his gaze locked with mine. “And you’re a very good man.”

He shuffles and looks away. “Fuck, I…” My gaze catches on his throat as he swallows. “Thank you. I guess I’m not used to people saying such things to me.”