Page 118 of Where the Wattles Bloom

‘Not really.’

Helena laughed. ‘Well, that’s honest.’ She pursed her lips as she cast a speculative eye over Rowena. ‘Let me guess … you were thinking about your baby daddy?’ She picked her glasses up again, put them on and looked at her screen. ‘Lachlan?’

‘Maybe.’

‘You don’t want to talk about him?’

‘Not really.’

‘And why is that?’

‘It’s … complicated.’

‘Because of the baby?’

‘Yes.’

‘Because he’s there and you’re here?’

‘Yes.’ Rowena contemplated not saying anything more, but if she couldn’t open up to her therapist, what was she even here for? Maybe Helena could give her some perspective. ‘And … he loves me.’

‘Ah.’ Helena paused. ‘I see.’ The glasses came off again. ‘And how do you feel about him?’

‘I … don’t know?’

Helena’s lips quirked. ‘Are you asking me or telling me?’

Rowena huffed out a frustrated breath. ‘I didn’t go there to fall in love with anyone.’

‘Sure. But … that’s not something you can control, right?’

‘I don’t see why not,’ she grumbled, which clearly amused Helena. ‘I’ve been in love before,’ Rowena clarified. ‘It doesn’t feel like that.’

‘Like what?’

Rowena remembered falling for her high school boyfriend. ‘Like a giddy spin.’

Helena laughed. ‘Maybe that’s because you’re not some young girl anymore, Rowena? You’re older. You’re warier. You’re wiser. You’ve been through a bunch of stuff. Love can feel different with different people and at different stages of your life.’

‘Are you saying I should love him?’

Helen smiled. ‘No. Not at all. But obviously you’re going to have some kind of a relationship with him, right?’ She paused for a breath then plunged on. ‘Okay … let’s try something different. Do you miss him?’

God, she missed him. So badly it was almost a physical ache. Sure, she’d been busy with work and settling back in to her old life, but not busy enough to ignore the giant empty chasm that had cracked her right open.

But she hadn’t contacted him. And he hadn’t contacted her. It was as if they both knew it was better to have clear air during this first month apart.

‘Yes,’ Rowena admitted. ‘But … I really miss working at the Acacia Junction hospital, too. That doesn’t mean I should quit my job and go work there.’

Even if they would take her back after skipping out on the last two weeks of her contract.

Helena shrugged. ‘Why not?’

Rowena blinked. Was that a trick question? ‘What do you mean?’

‘You miss it, right? So you must have enjoyed working there?’

‘Very much so.’