Page 81 of All the Things We Never Knew

FORTY-SEVEN

ANNA

‘And your son is a musician?’ I asked Seren Chamberlain politely. ‘I heard him play a few days ago. I was curious – and I was impressed.’

I took a sip of my cappuccino to settle my nerves.

‘First violinist with the National Orchestra of Wales,’ she told me proudly. ‘He’s overcome so many challenges to achieve what he has. I travel to see him perform whenever I can, and today seemed like the perfect opportunity to meet you too.’

‘I do appreciate it.’ I meant it – but still my tone was polite and stilted.

‘And I’m very sorry for your loss, Anna.’ Her formality matched mine, but I wondered whether she was remembering the boy she had known – Nigel.

‘Thank you.’

We fell into an awkward silence, filled by the roar of the coffee machine behind us.

Seren leaned towards me and cleared her throat. ‘Bryn – the former head teacher at St Gwbert’s – told me you were interested in finding out more about your late husband’s schooldays.’

‘That’s right. It feels as if – well, it’s always felt like that’s something he never shared much with me. Now that he’s gone, I find myself wanting to know more. Particularly for our children, because they’ll never be able to ask him about that part of his life now.’

I thought of the bequest Gray had asked to make to the charity he seemed to have no connection with, his affair with Laurel, the dire place our marriage had been in before his diagnosis. But that was too much information – there was no need to share any of it with this prim-looking woman, with her neat, tailored dress, her pot of tea and the beige hearing aids clearly visible behind her ears.

‘He was a very gifted pianist, your Nigel,’ she observed. ‘But you must know that.’

‘I didn’t,’ I said, more bitterly than I intended. ‘Until recently, I had no idea… It was something he never talked about.’

She shook her head, pouring more tea into her cup. ‘Such a shame. But understandable, I suppose. His home life was… well, it was troubled.’

‘Can you tell me more about that? I know his father wasn’t really around. That must have been hard for him.’

‘Hard, perhaps, yes. Certainly it might have been easier if Nigel had had a father who was more present. Because it was his mother who… I don’t like to say she was the problem.’

‘But she was the problem?’

Seren finished her tea. ‘I rather think, Anna, that I would like a glass of wine. Would you?’

‘Yes.’ Probably too eagerly, I stood up. ‘I’ll get them.’

I grabbed some tiny bottles of white from the café fridge, paid for them and returned to our table.

‘Maybe you could start at the beginning,’ I suggested, taking a sip and feeling it hit my bloodstream almost immediately.

I realised I hadn’t eaten all day, but that didn’t matter.

She sighed. ‘I only knew Nigel when he was a boy. Joel had been accepted into St Gwbert’s, and we were delighted – it wasn’t just that it’s a good school, although it is, it was because of the advantages it would give him when it came to his music. And we knew – he’d had some health problems. He wasn’t a well child.’

Which is why he ended up needing a kidney transplant, I thought. But I didn’t want to talk about Joel now – not least because I got the sense that, given half a chance, Seren Chamberlain would talk about nothing else for hours on end.

‘Gray – Nigel’s mum must have been proud too.’

‘That was the funny thing,’ she said. ‘I never got the impression she was. Bryn mentioned once that his primary school headmistress had helped Nigel with the application and all Louisa Graham did was sign the forms.’

Louisa Graham – it was the first time she had mentioned Gray’s mother’s name. I leaned across the table, opening the second of my miniature bottles of wine. I felt as if I was getting closer, now, to what I’d come there to discover.

‘She must have known he had a gift for music, though,’ I said.

‘I believe so.’ Seren’s eyes were distant, as if she was struggling to recall details of a time far in the past. ‘I think Gray may have sung in the church choir as a child, long before I knew him. Louisa herself used to play an instrument – it may have been the flute. But that was before… Before I knew him.’