Page 35 of Always Be My Pumpkin

‘Just listen to me, please, Gracie,’ he says as he reaches the desk, and he sounds almost nervous. I mutter an apology to Gertrude and usher him down the back, behind the ancient history section. Of all days he has to pick this one. Ella’s on late shift, our book delivery is due any minute, and there’s a parent and toddler meet-up at eleven. If I don’t get Jamie out of here fast, my dreams of workplace harmony are dust.

I frown at the offering he holds out. Seriously, what a cheek. Sorry, I cheated on you weeks ago, and barely bothered to contact you since, but look, I got you a dozen fancy roses, are we good? I keep my hands by my sides and shake my head. ‘I told you I’d call when I’m ready.’

‘I know.’ He lowers the bouquet. ‘But I thought if I had a chance to talk to you properly, away from that loser—’

‘Excuse me?’ I glare at him. I don’t need to ask who he means.

‘I didn’t come here to argue. But we really need to talk.’ He glances back to the desk, and I turn to see Gertrude scowling through a gap in the shelf. ‘Not here, obviously. But I have your books and some of your knitting stuff. You’ll want those back.’

‘Sarah can drop them over. Or I can call when you’re out.’

‘Gracie, be reasonable, please.’ He drops the roses onto a nearby table and grabs hold of my hand. I flinch and pull it back.

‘What, I can’t even touch you? After all these years?’ He looks upset, but I think that’s mostly frustration at not getting his own way.

‘I’d rather you didn’t.’

‘Maybe Olivia was right.’ He pouts. ‘You have been waiting for him to come back all along.’

There’s a flash of hurt in his eyes, and a pang of guilt stabs at my chest. Jamie watches my expression change and he pounces. ‘He’s a waste of time. And a college dropout.’ His upper lip curls in a sneer. ‘He only came back to see what he can get when Pat sells that land. And he won’t stay, Gracie, you know that yourself. He’ll leave you again.’

I can’t believe I just defended him to Gertrude and here he is trashing Flynn again. That’s the last time I’ll ever defend Jamie to anyone. I’m so angry I could scream, but I don’t want to cause a scene, so I wait for him to finish, even though I’ve heard it all before.

‘I didn’t leave us.’ He clenches his jaw. ‘You’re the one who left. And all I’m asking for is one conversation. One evening where it’s just the two of us and we can talk properly without anyone else getting in the way. Is that too much to expect?’

I want to tell him to get lost. But maybe he has a point. Maybe we do need one more conversation. A final one.

‘Please, Gracie,’ he starts again. ‘One evening. That’s all I’m asking for. I’ve booked us a table at Oakwood House for eight o’clock on Saturday.’

‘Saturday?’ I was looking forward to a movie and takeout, and Flynn and me curling up on the couch.

‘I thought you might have a meeting on Friday, but I can change it if you want.’ He leans closer, eyes pleading. ‘It’ll be private in Oakwood House and we can talk properly.’

‘And you’ll listen to me?’ I ask, my voice tense, throat tight. Jamie nods.

I do have a meeting on Friday, even if it is only with Finbarr to go over a few festival details. And the restaurant at Oakwood House is a lot more private than the Corner Bar. And I do have things I need to say, to finally get through to him, once and for all, that no matter how much he thinks he can persuade me, this time we are most definitely over for good.

‘Okay, Saturday night. I’ll meet you there.’ I turn and point to the door. ‘Now take your pathetic flowers and go.’

‘I’ll feel a lot better if you let me drop you off and pick you up later, after I catch up with Pat.’ Flynn skims a stone across the calm blue water of the lake, on Saturday afternoon.

‘Are you sure? I was going to ask Sarah, but they’re at a wedding.’ I hold my hand over my eyes to block out the afternoon sun as I look up to check that he really is comfortable with driving me. I didn’t like to ask, but I don’t want to walk through the woods in the dark. And I definitely don’t want Jamie to drive me home after dinner. If we make it through the meal.

‘Yeah, of course, I’m sure.’ He hesitates and his voice comes out strained. ‘Although, I’d feel better if you hadn’t agreed to meet him at all.’

I sigh. ‘I need to clear the air. And I need to make sure Jamie accepts that we’re over.’

Flynn drops down on the bench behind us. ‘He won’t give up easily.’ He peers up at me with an anxious frown. ‘I told you, from what I overheard, he’s dead set on persuading you to go to Australia with him.’

I shake my head impatiently. ‘That doesn’t mean I will.’

‘Are you sure?’ His voice is low, uneven. ‘You did agree to a romantic dinner at Oakwood House, after all.’ He tugs at his fringe, and sends it all scruffy, and he looks so gorgeous I almost groan.

I turn around and focus on a heron standing completely still by the edge of the lake. It’s easier than staring at Flynn. He’s too distracting.

‘I’ve already told you, and Jamie, and anybody else who’ll listen, that we’re over. I have no interest in moving to Australia, or anywhere that’s not here.’ I turn back and join Flynn on the wrought-iron bench. ‘It will be good for me to be on my own.’ I lift my chin as I face him. ‘It’ll give me time to focus on what I want for a change and not revolve my life around someone else’s plans.’ I feel proud of myself as I say this and realise it’s true.

‘I hope you tell Jamie that,’ Flynn says quietly, then his voice takes a serious tone. ‘And I hope you do focus on what you want, Gracie. You spend so much time and energy trying to keep everybody happy.’ He peers into my eyes as I turn to face him. ‘You deserve to be happy too.’