Page 55 of The Endless One

“I’m certain that has been said before. It would be a highly intelligent thing to employ. After all, there are a large portion of people who are terrified of spiders.” Jessamine rolled onto his chest, staring down at him with a maniacal grin. “Why haven’t you thought of that, oh great and powerful Deathless One?”

“I have employed shadow spiders, but never real ones.” His hands framed her hips, and he nudged her down closer for a kiss. “But now perhaps I will, thanks to your genius.”

“That’s all I ask for, really. An army of spiders to do my bidding, and the recognition that I am far more intelligent than the average person.”

They were silly conversations. Thoughts that would never have taken flight without the added calm of this realm, and the darkness that allowed them to be a little more truthful than they had been moments before. It was during quiet times like these that she really appreciated everything he offered her. Quiet, peace, love. All the things that she had always wanted as a child, but had never been afforded until him.

But eventually, all good things must come to an end. They needed to return. They needed to prepare for all that was soon to happen, and they needed to be willing to do it.

She leaned down and kissed him one last time. “I will prepare the others. Where would you like us to meet you?”

“Sybil will know.”

She kissed him again, this one tasting a bit like desperation. “We’re going to be fine. We’ll get all the energy we need. I just soaked it up from the pool with you. That should be enough, right?”

She knew him well enough to read that careful glassy expression. He was hiding something from her, and she suspected what he was hiding was fear. He knew something. Or perhaps he suspected something.

“Elric?” she asked. “We are going to be fine, aren’t we?”

“Of course we are.” He leaned forward and pressed a kiss to her forehead. “You’re going to be the queen this kingdom deserves. I promised you that, didn’t I?”

Something unnerving settled in her chest. The anxiety sank claws into her belly, dragging deeper into her flesh until she couldn’t think of anything else. But he’d said it would be fine. He’d said they would both be okay, and that meant…

She realized that meant nothing. Because he was the Deathless One, and though his word was binding, she had no power over what he said.

Wrapping her hand around his throat, she gave him a little shake. “You and me. Together. That’s what we said we would always be, and I’m holding you to that.”

He said nothing at all. He just stared into her eyes, looking lost and haunted, almost like he was the same man she’d met in this realm all those months ago. And then he sighed and kissed her one more time. “It’s time for you to go, nightmare.”

She was shoved out of his realm so forcefully there wasn’t a chance she could fight it. One moment she was straddling him, holding on to his neck as though her life depended on it, and the next, she was blinking her eyes open in the meager sunlight of her old bedroom in the castle.

It was hard to wake from moments like those. It was a dream she wanted to dive back into. Perhaps if she did, she could convince him to change his mind or perhaps show him there was another way than whatever he was planning.

But it was already too late. Elric had made up his mind, and she knew without a doubt that he would get her and the coven where they needed to go. She just wasn’t all that certain how he intended to get them there.

Rolling onto her side, she curled in on herself for a few moments.

“It’s okay to break,” she whispered to herself. “Just as long as you put yourself back together again.”

They were words her mother had said to her more times than she could count. When times grew difficult or when Jessamine had been overwhelmed with the expectations laid upon her shoulders, this was the room she would sneak off to. Her mother had never made her feel guilty for crying or even needing the space.

Break, but don’t stay broken.

When the knock came on her bedroom door, she was ready for it. Jessamine pulled herself together, forcibly putting the pieces back where they needed to be until she was almost a semblance of herself. She was strong. She was capable. She was the queen they needed her to be.

Jessamine stayed where she was and called out, “Come in!”

She already knew who it was. The only person who ever knocked so politely was Sybil. The others would either pound on the door or knock so lightly that she couldn’t even hear them. Few witches were so confident to come to her room, anyway.

Sybil entered, and the quiet sound of disappointment filled the room. “Oh, dear one. I thought you’d be much more awake than this.”

“It feels like a day of mourning, not one of hope.”

Sybil remained standing in the doorway for a few moments, likely trying to figure out how to get Jessamine out of this funk. But she didn’t need to think long. Jessamine had been lying there with her heart in her throat for too long. She would make this happen, even if it killed her.

Still, it felt nice to stay in bed while Sybil headed over to the windows and threw the curtains open so light could flood into the space.

“Rotting in your bedroom might be part of the problem,” Sybil scolded. “You’re going to get up, wash your face, and put some clean clothes on. That will help. This is a day where we will fix what has been broken. It is not a day of mourning.”