Page 91 of Knot Broken

“You don’t look OK.”

Ethan was all concern, moving closer to place one hand on my shoulder, the other covering my hand.

“No, I’m…”

There was no room to protest, not when this sensation smashed into me. Pain, pure, unadulterated pain had my eyes falling closed because I could only focus on one thing, and this was it. My breath came in faster and faster pants, right before a strangled moan was dragged out of me.

That had my eyelids flicking open.

Making a fuss, that’s what Mum would’ve called this, so I found my lips pressing together, trying to stop any further sounds from escaping. I’d asked for this.

“I’m fine,” I said and for a moment, that was true. The pain was like a wave and now it was retreating, leaving me swaying on my feet. “It’s just… Ahh!”

Ethan didn’t tell me about this. That it felt like whatever the hell was inside me was trying to claw its way out. Tearing muscles, slicing through essential organs as I pitched forward, my hands slapping down on the floor. Head hanging, I fought to take another breath.

“Is it happening?” Tex crouched down beside me, staring wide eyed. As his hand went to rub my back, my whole body spasmed. It was like I’d lost all control of it, every muscle twitching, shaking, and I was just along with the ride. “Fuck, Nadia. Nadia!” His hands hovered uselessly in the air and for some reason that had my lips peeling back in a snarl. “I’m getting Riley.”

“Running away as soon as it gets tough.”

That wasn’t my voice, but the words came from my mouth in a low growl, but I was the one forced to watch Tex flinch as if in pain.

“Shit, I didn’t mean that,” I panted. “It’s just… It’s just…”

Whatever the hell this was, I didn’t get a chance to describe it. More pain than I’ve ever felt smashed through me, breaking down every barrier, every boundary so that my head was forced backwards as I let out a piercing scream.

“Can we give her some fucking pain relief?” Ethan marched over to the glass wall, staring Riley down. “Something to take the edge off, at least?”

“Oh, now you care?”

What the fuck was that? My voice was deeper, a low snarl as my head turned of its own accord, slowly staring him down.

“No, that’s not—” I stammered out.

“Nadia.”

As Ethan fell backwards, milk pale, Grey appeared in the door. He strode across the floor, dropping to his knees before me.

“So now you bother to turn up?”

When I was a kid, my teenage cousins babysat me one night and let me watch a horror movie where characters were possessed by the Devil. That’s what this felt like now. As if I was sitting in some small space in the back of my head, watching everything that was going on like it was happening to someone else. But it was no demonic entity that was taking over my body, but her. Grey went very still, so I caught the moment when his eyes bled to perfect silver.

“I came as soon as Tex messaged me.”

“I know.” The words came out almost as a sob. “I’m sorry. I don’t know why I’m being like this. It’s just… ahhh!” My arms shot out straight in front of me, my fingers spasming into claws. The pain that came with that took my breath away. All I could manage was a thin whine that felt like it went on and on, until finally it trailed away. “I’m being such a fucking bitch,” I gasped, feeling the need to collapse, but unable to. I wasn’t in control.

She was.

“Be a fucking bitch,” Grey said.

“What the freaking hell, Grey?” Ethan hissed, but the other man just smiled at me in a way that was all too familiar.

If every shadow in the room moved of its own accord, winding its way around Grey’s form, I wouldn’t have been surprised. He held my gaze as I panted faster and faster, knowing what was coming and sure enough, another strangled cry was forced out of me as one shoulder was jerked sideways, then the other. The joint instantly protested as it twisted in ways it never had before. No more screams were possible in the face of agony. It felt like the wolf and I were in a fight to the death and she was winning.

“Say it.” Grey moved closer with the fluid grace of a big cat. “Say whatever the hell you’re thinking.”

“So you’ve got an excuse to run again?”

Mentally, I pleaded with him to understand, that this wasn’t me. Everyone had apologised. We’d moved past this. Instead, Grey just smiled.