Page 88 of Knot Broken

She settled back into the wooden outdoor chair with a small sigh.

“How did…?” This felt too stupid to ask. “You know I struggled to control my animal.”

“I remember.” She shot me a wry look. “Does the wolf still talk to you?”

I shook my head.

“All the time. The prick has an opinion about every damn thing.”

“And what does he think about your mate?” she asked in careful tones.

“He’s obsessed by her.” I flopped into a nearby chair. “Has been since the moment I laid eyes on Nadia.” With a flush, I remembered exactly how that happened, then looked over at my foster mother. “That’s part of the problem. Nadia is a latent. She’s struggling to shift.”

“Shit, Grey…”

She leaned forward and turned to face me.

“And right when she needs me to hold it together, I…” My hands trembled and before my eyes, fur prickled across my skin and claws formed. Muscles stretched the seams of my shirt as I started to Hulk out. “I lose it. Seeing her hurting, hearing her scream, I…”

A hand landed on my forearm and suddenly, my heart slowed. Nails reappeared, as did skin, and I let out a long shuddering breath.

“What is that?” I took her hand in mine. “How do you do that? Whenever I’m around you, I calm down and suddenly I’m completely in control. Like is this some weird foster parent hoodoo you guys learn or something?”

“Don’t you know?” She smiled gently. “Grey, you were half-feral, out of control when you came here, and the department was very wary of placing you in my home. They were concerned about me, the other kids, and I admit, so was I on some level. But when we first met, when I stared into your eyes, I saw something.” A squeeze of my arm. “You were like a wolf starved of food, water, light…” She patted it before pulling back. “A pack. I knew I had to earn your trust, integrate you into the family we had in this place, and then once you had that connection, you’d protect every single one of us with everything you had.”

I was quiet, didn’t say much, but worked hard in class. Teachers liked me, right up until the moment they didn’t. If someone started on one of the other foster kids, all bets were off. I’d sail over my desk and be in the bully’s face in seconds, ready to throw down. Never once did I fight someone for my own sake, but anyone that lived under this roof? I lived and died for them. We’d all gone our separate ways now, but back then…

“So was it the breathing exercises?” I asked. “Or the visualisations…” My voice trailed away as she shook her head.

“This probably isn’t what you want to hear right now, but it was love.” My rude snort had her smiling. “I know it sounds cheesy, but that’s what it was. Humans need connection and no one had bothered to do that with you. The wolf protected you from your parents’ crap and then it just kept everyone at arm’s length, making clear it would bite first, ask questions later, but your beast? He’s a beautiful creature. Such soft fur. Loved a good belly scratch. Scared the freaking hell out of me the first time he appeared, but I dunno. I saw past the raised hackles and fangs that could tear me to pieces, because somehow I just knew he never would.” She shrugged. “After that, we bonded. I made clear I’d always look after him and so he returned the favour.”

Always, the wolf growled inside my head.

“But…” I leaned forward, clasping my hands. “He’s pushing me to my limits. I’m listening to my mate scream in agony and he’s trying to take over. Bite her, claim her, he keeps telling me, until I’m forced to bolt from the room lest I lose control.”

“Your wolf has always known what to do to protect you and those you care about,” she said. “It might be time to start trusting him.”

“What?” I couldn’t believe what I was saying. “Everything you taught us about consent. Nadia said she isn’t ready for the mating bond yet.”

“The wolf is the most primal part of you. On some level, he knows exactly what to do.” A self-satisfied huff filled my ears as I felt the wolf move. “If you’re struggling to work out what to do, then maybe you need to spend some time with him, asking him what he thinks?”

We sat there for a while longer, filling each other in on the minutiae of the other’s lives, but when I headed for the car, I felt a curious, hollow feeling. Love? Bloody hell, what kind of answer was that? Scrubbing my hand across my face, I let out a breath, then stared into the rear-vision mirror to back the car out.

Only to see silver eyes staring back at me.

I know what to do, the wolf said. I know how to help my mate.

Be there as she tries to shift. My suggestion felt like a whisper in the face of an incoming storm. Support Nadia’s choices.

She wants to meet her wolf, but she’s kept the wild side of herself locked down for so long, nothing can get past her defences, he replied. Except me. My lips moved into a sly smile that wasn’t my own. I am stronger, more powerful than any mental block. If she wants to shift? Watching my fangs slowly descend was unnerving. Then I’ll be the one to make that happen.

Chapter 42

Nadia

My toxic trait was I always needed to know what the worst possible scenario was. I’d look up airplane crash statistics when travelling or read all the negative reviews of a new restaurant we were going to. I’d read scientific articles until my eyes bled during the heights of COVID. It was like if I knew what could happen if literally everything went wrong, then I was allowed to be pleasantly surprised when things worked out well.

Maybe that’s why I followed Ethan into this empty examination room.