Page 77 of Meteor Storm

She didn’t believe me, but she wanted to. You could do a lot by wanting to believe something, even convince yourself it was true. But we both knew what would happen. Devin would order me about as he finished off a twelve pack, but he wouldn’t hurt me. Not like that. He used a heavy hand on me.

…A gentle hand on Natascha.

No matter how many times I put myself in between them, Devin never wanted me. He wanted Natascha and her perfect rosy cheeks and her bright blond hair and bright eyes. He liked her innocence. Her naivety. I was too rough around the edges already. To mature.

My stomach tightened at the thought and if I had to endure a drunken slap to my head while I put the dishes in the dishwasher, I would, because a smack on the head went away. What he liked to do with Natascha would stay forever. A smack to my face. A kick to my ribs. No food for a day or two.

I could take it…

I reached in, squeezing her hand. “I’m going to protect you, Nat.”

“Who’s going to protect you?”

I smiled. “I don’t need protection. I’m a big girl.”

Earth felt millions of miles away.

In truth, it was much further than that, but something about the expanse made things feel unreal. I kept thinking I could jump back to Earth at any moment, but I was in the middle of nowhere on a ship with a man—an alien—that my heart was aching for against all odds and reason.

I stared out of Thilar’s window, standing in his room like a lonely puppy with my arms hugged around my waist. He told me his door would remain unlocked and he wasn’t lying. That room, however, wasn’t really his. It didn’t smell like him. It had nothing of his in it. We were both stripped bare after Mekah. I desperately wanted to know what a room would be like if it was truly his, filled with his things.

Then I imagined my things being beside them and had to shake the thoughts out of my head.

“He’s an alien, Penny,” I muttered to myself.

Happily ever afters were silly…

They were something Natascha believed in so much that every hardship just shattered her fantasies… until she turned to anything that could blind her to reality.

I sighed loudly, lowering my head.

I missed her. I spent my whole life protecting her and she spent her whole life getting into trouble. Never once did I think about looking after myself, I realized. I joined the military to protect better. I planned to join the police force to protect.

In the end, I couldn’t do any of it.

Another wave of sorrow hit me.

I would never know if the men responsible for her death (and mine) had been caught or if they ever would.

When I could finally lift my head again and face the endless blackness we were flying through, my eyes happened to refocus on a reflection in the glass. Thilar was standing behind me, leaning against the doorway, quiet as still air.

I turned to face him and immediately he doused the burn in my gut over Natascha and everything I left behind on Earth.

“You’re so quiet,” I said.

“And you are so deep in thought.”

His body was so big. So solid. So warm. I wanted to step forward and bury myself in it and pull his arms around me, but my walls were creeping up knowing that we’d have to part ways soon. I could not get addicted to leaning on him or I’d forget to stand on my own and standing on my own was something I’d been trying to perfect my whole life.

“What are you thinking about?” Thilar asked.

“My sister. She would have liked space a lot more than me. She’d be thriving in the stars. She had a much more fantastical view of the world.”

“And you? What is your view of the world?”

I smiled. “I would call myself a cynic. I think the worst of everything so that I’m not surprised when I’m let down.” Staring at Thilar, I felt my smile falling and my heart fell with it. “And then you happened. And you keep not letting me down. Every promise you make, you keep it.”

“I always keep my promises.”