Page 29 of Waking Roslyn

“Why not?”

“If Edmund wants to know where I’ve disappeared to, you can honestly tell him you don’t know.”

“Oh. Yes, that’s an excellent idea. In fact, don’t tell me any of your plans.” She stood. “I have to go prepare for the day. Edmund has asked that I be the one to give Lord Farbury a tour of the house.”

She seemed excited by the idea and I smiled, happy that she was happy. She kissed her fingers and waved them my way, the same way she’d done since we were children.

After breakfast, Everly came to lace me into the simplest of my dresses, and when I was ready, I took the servants’ stairs down to the first floor and found the library. Sitting in the windowsill, hidden behind the heavy drapes with a book in my lap, was so reminiscent of my time at home that it made me melancholy, but in a good way—in the way that reminds you that there are people in the world who love you without condition, even if you can’t be with them.

Lisette found me at the lunch hour and let me know that Edmund and Lord Farbury had gone for a ride into the village, so it was safe for us to dine together.

“Has he asked about me?” I asked, remembering Everly’s words from last night.

“He hasn’t,” she said. And though that should have been a good thing, she sounded worried. “I know he saw you walking away last evening, but he hasn’t asked about you. And that feels more ominous than if he were to ask.”

My brow furrowed, and I was stuck in paranoid thoughts for the rest of the meal. My only comfort was that he had not seen my face, and even if he had, four years had changed me, and we had never had a close association. And, as far as I knew, he’d never hated me enough to want me dead.

Since I was anxious to avoid Edmund and Lord Farbury’s return, I went outside a full fifteen minutes before John and I were supposed to meet, happy to have the woods where I could hide and no one would be the wiser.

The weather was temperate, and I had yet to tire of the fact that I could stroll as far as the eye could see and smell as many flowers as I liked without being watched by curious members of court or having someone interrupt my wandering. I could take up space here, and no one seemed to mind.

Of course, as it turned out, my wandering was interrupted as I walked among the trees. I had done nothing at all to be disruptive, and yet I was receiving a thorough chastening. The bird was on the ground, squawking and flailing.

“Whatever is the matter?” I asked, curious that this bird would scold me instead of flying away. “I’m certain I didn’t tread on you, and I haven’t been throwing any stones.”

It continued to squawk and I smiled, amused by its antics. I crouched down, hoping that might be less threatening. “I’m really not such a bad person,” I tried to assure the creature. It crouched lower and stuck out a wing at an awkward angle. “Are you hurt? Do you need help?” I reached out a hand, but that only made it worse.

“You’ve angered the mama bird,” a voice called from behind me.

I turned to see John coming toward me. “I didn’t mean to, and how do you know it’s a mother?”

“Come here,” he said, beckoning me over to him.

I went willingly, trusting his judgment.

As I went farther from the bird, she became quieter but still squawked.

“It’s a killdeer,” John said.

I looked at him in confusion. “What?”

“The name of the bird. It’s called a killdeer. They make their nests on the ground instead of in trees. When something comes too close, the mother will go away from the nest and throw a tantrum in an effort to draw the predator away from her young.”

“Oh.” I looked back at the bird, feeling quite guilty now. “I’m so sorry, madam, I didn’t mean to frighten you.”

John chuckled. “What are you doing?”

“Apologizing,” I said as I slowly backed away, giving the poor, frightened mother bird her space.

“To a bird?” he asked as he backed up alongside me.

“Yes, of course. She was talking to me. It’s only fair that I respond, especially now that I know what she was saying.”

The killdeer was quieting, so I turned my back to her and continued walking away, John’s mass keeping pace at my side.

“Do you make a habit of talking to animals?” John asked after a few moments.

I lifted a shoulder, just now realizing how odd that might seem to him. “Animals are easier to get along with than people, and they are far less likely to ridicule.” I probably sounded like I didn’t like people as a rule, which wasn’t true at all. I desperately wanted to be accepted and befriended, but I had spent most of my life being unwanted by everyone outside my own home. Those of my class in Saldine had shunned me, and drawing close to people in Winhaven had seemed dangerous. The only time I’d been able to comfortably make friends was during the three years I’d spent living under my uncle’s roof with Lisette.