Page 53 of Ruin

He starts to walk away from me.

My heart wants me to yell at him, I’m not ready to hear what yet?

But logic tells me to say, “I’m not interested in anything you have to say.” And that’s exactly what I do.

He stops at my words. His back turned to me. A few beats later, he looks over his shoulder at me. “I didn’t give that waitress my number. If you were wondering.”

“I wasn’t,” I say too quickly, giving myself away. I hate the relief I feel that he didn’t give Megan his number.

A smile creeps onto his lips. “You always were a terrible liar, Dove. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

And yet again, he walks away from me, getting the last word in.

It’s been almost two weeks since Zeus showed up on my doorstep and discovered that he had a daughter. He’s seen Gigi every single day. Even on Tuesday when she has a street dance class after pre-K. He asked if he could drop her off and pick her up. He also took her out alone on Sunday morning—to the movies to watch a reshowing of Tangled.

I did chuckle at the thought of Zeus Kincaid watching a Disney princess movie.

But it shows what he’s willing to do to be with her. I can’t fault him at his instant devotion to her. He’s fallen hook, line, and sinker for our girl.

And she adores him, too.

Gigi still doesn’t know that Zeus is her father. But I know we’re getting close to that time.

Zeus hasn’t once pushed the issue with me or asked when we’re going to tell her the truth.

I guess I’m delaying it because I’m scared of her reaction. But also because it would make it real.

I need to be braver and tell her.

I’m thinking this weekend will be the best time. After her morning ballet class. Zeus has asked to take her. So, we can sit down together after that and tell her.

Zeus is here. He’s in the living room with Gigi, playing Guess Who?—the My Little Pony version. He brought it with him for her.

It’s the only other gift he’s bought her since he got her Princess Twilight Sparkle that first day, so I don’t mind too much. She takes that toy everywhere with her. I think it’s partly because she always wanted one. But more so because Zeus bought it for her.

I’m in the kitchen, making dinner. We’re having mac and cheese. Nothing too fancy. Zeus is staying for food, like he has every night. No Aunt Elle tonight, as she’s at the station. She’s not been home a lot lately. She’s got some big case going on.

But she said she would watch Gigi tomorrow night for me, so I can go out for a drink with Rich.

I guess I could’ve asked Zeus to watch her for me, but it would’ve felt weird, asking him to babysit her while I was out with Rich. Even though Rich is just a friend. I know Zeus has a problem with him. So, it’s not worth the hassle.

It’s hard, being around Zeus so much. Our relationship is strained, but we’re cordial to each other. It’s almost like we dance around each other. We exchange pleasantries. Yeses and noes. Pleases and thank-yous. But not a real conversation.

If I’m being truthful, I still harbor a hell of a lot of anger and resentment for how he ended our relationship. But I have to bury that, for Gigi’s sake. I have to pretend. That I never loved him. That he never broke my heart.

It’s hard.

I still want answers from him that I never got.

The main questions being, Why did he do it? Why did he cheat on me?

If he had fallen out of love with me, then why not end things with me before dipping his dick in someone else?

I mean, I would have been heartbroken if he’d ended things with me because he didn’t love me anymore. But to know that he had sex with another woman…it destroyed me.

And I’ve never really come to terms with those feelings. Because, a few months later, I found out that I was pregnant with Gigi and was made to believe that he wanted nothing to do with her, so my anger for him turned to hate. I hated him for abandoning his child.

Now that I know that was never the case, my anger and resentment have swung back to what he did to me.