Page 50 of The Worst Possible Plan

But he’d come.

And like a fool, I’d fallen... and he’d caught me.

And then there was the whole staring-at-my-lips thing. He had stared at them. That wasn’t a hallucination.

Still, it was almost like he was checking up on me. To make sure I didn’t screw up and accidentally electrocute myself. Could happen.

It was almost like he wanted me to succeed, which was really strange. Most people spent their time waiting for me to mess up. He’d spent his making sure I didn’t.

I frowned. “Maybe that’s just what sheriffs do.”

Bandit sneezed.

“I know. It sounds suspicious to me too.” I reached for Helen’s binder beside me and slipped my hand into the front pocket. My fingers brushed against stiff cardstock.

His business card.

I’d almost forgotten I’d put it there. I pulled it out and ran my thumb over the raised black lettering of his name.

Weird. Somehow, the simple white card suited him perfectly. No unnecessary flourishes. Just Sheriff Eric Walker.

A man of few words.

Unlike me.

Captain Competent probably alphabetized his spice rack and folded fitted sheets for fun.

I smiled to myself. “He’s annoyingly…” I searched for the right word. “Solid. With a great ass.”

Theo blinked.

“I know.” I shook my head. “It’s irritating. But he’s not half as bad as I first thought. I would even go as far as saying he’s a decent guy.”

Bandit pushed himself up and wandered closer.

I snorted. “Who knows. Maybe one day we can even be friends⁠—”

Before I could react, Bandit stretched out his neck and plucked the business card straight out of my fingers and started chewing.

“Hey!” I lunged toward him. “Drop it. That’s not food! Give it!”

Bandit took two proud steps backward, happily working his jaw.

“Spit out the sheriff!” Yeah, that sounded weird.

He blinked and kept chewing.

“Damnit.” I reached for the card.

Bandit danced sideways.

I frowned. “You little shit. You think this is a game. Don’t you?”

The goat took another step. Another chew. He was doing it on purpose.

“Give. It. Back.”

Theo wandered over to watch. Daisy stayed exactly where she was. Smart girl.