Page 46 of The Gaybor War

I need to get off the block. Literally and mentally. Staying in Morningwood—or staring out my window at that ridiculous man and his overwatered marigolds—is making me lose what little composure I’ve got left.

So, I leave. I drive. I don’t even care where, just somewhere not here. I find myself at a little café two towns over, with uneven tile floors, espresso that tastes like actual espresso, and chairs that squeak when you sit down. No HOA gossip. No flamingo-infested lawns. No one telling me I have to volunteer.

I get a window seat, because yes, I like to watch people—neutral people. Ordinary humans doing ordinary things. A barista struggles to balance a tray of scones. A kid drops a muffin. No one is weaponizing kitsch or turning a salad spinner into a sex joke.

I order a cappuccino and let it cool while I stare out the window at the quiet street. For five glorious minutes, I hear nothing but the rhythm of cars passing, a dog barking too loudly down the street, and the occasional bell above the café door.

I should feel better. I want to feel better. But even here, my mind keeps drifting. To accounts I should be working on. To community projects I should be ignoring. To Benji. The way he moves. The way he laughs. The way he makes every quiet moment feel like foreplay.

Even off the block, even surrounded by boring everyday life, I can’t clear my head, and I realize I’m not running from Morningwood. I'm running from the fact that I drove twenty miles to get away from Benji and brought him with me anyway.

And the most irritating part is that Benji isn't chasing me.

If anything, I'm the one following him.

The Morningwood Monthly

Official Newsletter of Morningwood Estates

Vol. 48, Issue 8

Rise and Shine, Morningwood!

Dear Residents,

It’s shaping up to be a big month for community spirit! Please remember that all shrubs should remain below three feet in height (we know how Morningwood likes to grow ). Thank you to everyone who came early to last week’s neighborhood cleanup. Your dedication keeps Morningwood beautiful!

As we wrap up summer, don’t forget the rocks and doors in your landscaping! Muddy rocks coated with pollen and grubby doors and doorknobs are a common oversight this time of year. A little washing and polishing rocks and knobs goes a long way toward keeping Morningwood sparkling—and let’s be honest, who doesn’t love a little shine under their fingers?

Upcoming Events:

Chili Cook-Off: Fall is around the corner, and nothing warms the heart like homemade chili. We can’t wait to taste your spicy meat! Show off your best chili recipes—mild or nuclear, we want it all.

HOA Board Meeting: Thursday night in the clubhouse. Attendance is mandatory for all brand-new Block Captains—come prepared to handle a lot of… paperwork.

Morningwood’s Third Birthday: Celebrate at the clubhouse on the fourth Saturday! Potluck Lunch—bring your best dish and show everyone what you’re really good at handling… we mean, serving.

Community Car Wash: Watch how well your neighbors can handle a hose. Bring towels—things might get wet.

Friendly Reminders:

Shrubs must remain under three feet in height.

Pick up after your pets. No one wants a surprise in the flower beds.

Collect your trash and towels when leaving community areas.

Supervise children during outdoor activities—let’s keep everything where it belongs.

From the Editor’s Desk:

Thank you to everyone contributing to our vibrant community. Morningwood wouldn’t sparkle quite the same without you! Keep rising, keep shining, and remember: a well-tended shrub is a neighbor’s best friend.

Your HOA Board:

Eunice Dobbins (President)

Herb Tilson (Vice President)