Page 24 of Infamous

‘Eddie hasn’t taken your horse, Mama. What would she even do with it?’ said Rose, giving up the pretence and closing her book.

‘Sell it?’ ventured Mrs Li. ‘They’re very valuable, Rosie.’

‘I wouldn’t do anything quite so ordinary assellingit,’ said Eddie, sitting down heavily next to Rose and making her squeak as they collided. ‘I’d hold it for ransom. Send you little notes in blood that said “pony up, or you shall face your worst night mares .?.?.”’

Rose tried not to laugh and mostly succeeded. She side-eyed her mother quickly, looking rather sheepish, before muttering to Eddie, ‘No stalling.’

Eddie burst out laughing, and Mr Li put down the ledger he was holding and considered Eddie with mild disappointment. His employment – managing lodgings and other necessities for seamen recently arrived from China – took up so many of his waking hours that it was rare to see him without a bundle of papers in hand, or stacked so high he was barely visible behind them.

‘A pleasure to see you as always, Edith,’ he said, his tone intimating the exact opposite. Eddie wondered, not for the first time, if he or his wife had ever gently suggested to Rose that it might be time to end their long tradition of shared meals under his roof. ‘Mr Rednock tells us you have been hard at work on a novel.’

‘Has he been here?’ Eddie said, trying not to sound as horrified as she felt. ‘For dinner?’

‘Oh, yes,’ said Mrs Li, finally forgetting about her lost horse in favour of Albert Rednock. ‘And for tea, and we all took a walk with him yesterday.’

Eddie had long ago stopped asking Rose what she did on the days their paths did not cross, entirely out of a selfish desire to pretend that Rose’s life began and ended when Eddie walked into it; she couldn’t escape hearing about the parties and dinners she had not attended entirely, but Rose knew these stories rankled her, and kept them to a minimum. The discovery that Rose had apparently been spending her free time with Mr Rednock made Eddie’s stomach cramp violently.

‘You didn’t tell me that,’ she said to Rose.

Rose shrugged, as if it were immaterial, but she had gone slightly pink. ‘You didn’t ask.’

The whole thing left a bitter taste in Eddie’s mouth which she couldn’t rid herself of all through dinner, not even soothed by her favourite pork buns; she knew she ought to at least attempt to be winsome and likeable, to try harder to ingratiate herself with Rose’s parents even ifthatparticular horse had bolted the stables long ago, but she found herself even more curt and ornery than usual.

Afterwards both Mr and Mrs Li excused themselves, rather than spend another minute in her company, and Eddie barely noticed them go.

‘You could at least try to be pleasant,’ Rose said as they sat at the dinner table, watching Jemima clear it. ‘You were downright rude tonight, and you know they already think you’re a terrible influence – you’re not doing yourself any favours, Ed.’

‘Yes, but they know I makeyouhappy, and so they are forced to tolerate me out of love for their only daughter,’ Eddie said, pointing at Rose with her chopsticks before Jemima plucked them from her hand. ‘Look, I’m sorry, I’m not trying to be any more dreadful than usual. I just think .?.?. they’ve known me for fourteen years. If they don’t like me by now, I don’t see what I could possibly do to gain their good opinion, other than grow a new personality.’

‘You know it doesn’t require an entirely new personality to simply be polite and cordial and watch your tongue sometimes, rather than just saying whatever it is you get into your head without a moment’s consideration.’

‘Excuse me,’ said Eddie, sitting up straighter in her chair and glowering at Rose, who didn’t flinch. ‘Just because, unlike some people, I don’t pretend to be somebody else whenever it suits me – it is a sign of a lack of character to simply cast off your true self like an old shawl whenever it might inconveniencesociety, or—’

She broke off because Rose had pushed back her chair with a sudden scrape of wood on wood and abruptly left the room. Eddie sat for a moment, drumming her hand on the table, before deciding that it was no good being furious without an audience; she followed Rose upstairs and into her bedroom, letting the door slam shut behind her.

Although the Lis’ home was far smaller than the Millers’, they only had one daughter to share it with, and had given Rose the finest room in the house. It was just as large as Eddie’s, the furniture a little more worn than hers but carefully chosen and meticulously polished, a vase of marigolds placed neatly on the windowsill. Rose was sitting on the end of her bed, not bothering to pretend she was doing anything in particular except looking past Eddie at the wall.

‘Go on,’ said Rose. ‘Open fire.’

‘What do youseein him?’

‘Who?’

‘Albert Rednock!’

‘Oh,’ said Rose. She looked down at her hands, which were twisting in her dress as if trying to wring something out of it, and then back up at Eddie. ‘Well, I’ve already told you. He’s kind. He’s patient. I enjoy talking to him.’

‘But you’re not in love with him!’

‘No,’ said Rose. Eddie was surprised how easily she admitted it. ‘No, I’m not in love with him. But I think I’ll like being married to him. You know as well as I do that my father’s income isn’t half what it should be. My parents worry, they want to see me happy and married – and Albert’s position is very comfortable. I’ll like keeping my own house. I like his friends, and he lives not far from here so I’ll be able to see allmyfriends, too. I’d have thought you’d be happy that I’m not being whisked away to the country somewhere.’

‘How can I be happy about any of this?’ said Eddie, folding her arms. She felt immovable and resolute, taller than ever, filling the door frame. ‘The society parties I could just about stomach, but suddenly you’re going to marry this man we hardly know, because it’sconvenient? It doesn’t make sense!’

Rose sighed. ‘Do you ever think about what I might want, Eddie?’

‘Well .?.?. surely notthis. You said it yourself, you don’tlovehim. I can only assume that this is all just some .?.?. some part you’re playing, so that you’ll fit in with the rest of them. It’s a total overreaction!’

‘Stop it,’ said Rose, lifting her chin to meet Eddie head-on. ‘I don’t want to be your punchbag over this any more. I know you don’t approve or understand, but it’s mylife, and this is what I have decided. If you can’t make your peace with it, then maybe it’s .?.?. I don’t know. Maybe we just have to accept that what’s between us is something we’ve grown out of.’