Page 46 of Have We Met Before?

‘You did,’ she said, her cheeks still slightly pink not leaving my gaze. ‘You and your stories, you and your fantastical lie, you, and my mum and your scarily similar fascination with the clouds, well, this is what I wanted to create, something deeper, something beyond them, something we can’t see, but we can make up and lie about in stories and draw them in art,’ she said, losing my gaze dropping her head down and handing the microphone back to the woman next to her.

‘Em, this is incredible, this is beautiful it really is,’ I said walking closer to her. ‘Why didn’t you tell me this is what you’ve been working on?’ I asked, lowering my voice, forgetting about the hundred people standing around staring at us.

A single tear fell from her check, placing her hands to the bottom of her eyelids, throwing back her head to stop herself from crying in front of a room full of strangers. ‘Because I was so scared to show you how much you’ve impacted me,’ she said.

I gulped down, my heart beating through my chest. ‘And that’s why I’m not going to let you walk away,’ I said. I felt the eyes from all around the room glued on us, but all I could see was hers.

I turned around. ‘Hello everyone,’ I said waving. ‘I’m sorry I didn’t introduce myself properly before in my very rude entrance. I mean, I am Emma’s biggest fan, I hope I am, if I’m not, watch out because I’m coming for you, and I will outbid, for this piece,’ I said, the crowd laughed. ‘But my name is Lucas.’

‘We know who you are.’ A woman called out from deep in the crowd, making Emma giggle.

‘I’ve known Emma for a couple of years, and in the past my actions have been less than desirable. I know that she deserves better than I have ever given her, but I just, I can’t let her go, I can’t step down, I can’t let some other man sweep her off her feet, because I want to be the one who’s always firmly standing next to them, when she’s in the studio working on a new piece, when she gets to present her work to the world, when things are going good, when things are going bad, and when she falls, and can’t stand any longer, and just needs someone by her side, when things are unexplainable, and when they hurt a little too much for words,’ I said, staring back at Emma, she bit her lips shut as her eyes began to well again.

‘Emma’s art is a direct reflection of her, her honesty, looking at it now, it’s exactly how she sees the world. She sees things beyond this one, she can see galaxies far away, and she can see the hidden detail in all the things that are right here in front of us on earth, she can see people, she can see me fully, sometimes more than I can see myself,’ I said.

‘You see, I love Emma. And I told her that, but maybe I shouldn’t have. What I should have said first was I feel everything that you can already see and feel,’ I said, she wrapped her arms around her body, but her eyes never left my gaze.

‘I should have said, I love you, and loving you scares the hell out of me. Because loving you means that I’m going to be responsible for something beyond me, something that’s intense, that feels so out of our hands, something that I can explain, and I can’t plan and I don’t know if I can be the person that you deserve, I don’t know that I’m not going to fuck up, in fact I probably will do the wrong thing all the time. I’m so far from perfect, and I’m so scared of all the things that you make me feel. You, Emma, are my biggest inspiration in life. Ever since I met you, you always have been.’ I walked closer to her. Standing right in front of her. ‘I can sit here, and I can tell you how scared I am. But what’s scarier is not trying, is not giving my all to this and showing you what it could be, and, what’s scarier is walking away, and letting another man love you. When really, I want that to be me, I want you, I want us,’ I said, my voice cracked, and tears fell. The crowd began clapping and cheering and she took a step towards me, wrapping her arms around me and I squeezed her in tight.

‘I’ll try my hardest not to let you down.’ I whispered in her ear.

She laughed, squeezing me tighter, ‘I know you will, and I will to you, but that’s okay if we do, that’s life, and that’s what I’ve chosen,’ she said.

‘What we’ve chosen,’ I said, leaning in to kiss her, lifting her feet off the ground, the crowd screamed louder.

I stood on the sidewalk outside of the gallery, leaning up against the old brick building as Emma said her goodbyes. She jumped around the corner, trying to scare me I laughed holding her in tight.

‘This wasn’t meant to end like this’ she said, muffled into my chest. ‘I was meant to let you go.’

I let go of her, holding on to her hands as she pulled away.

‘Why?’ I asked.

‘I know about America, and you have to go, you must go, you can’t let me hold you back.’

‘Em… I…’

‘No, I’m serious, I’m not taking no for an answer, if you want this, if you’ve chosen me, then this is what you get, you have to let me go sometimes to go and do your thing, while I’m still working on mine. If you’ve chosen me then it means I’m never going to let you stop dreaming. I mean, I would love to join you, but I can’t, I have my life here, but I can come and visit,’ she said.

I stared into her eyes, she was so cute I couldn’t help but giggle, she was so serious, crossing her forehead at me. ‘So, this is what it was all about, America?’

‘Yeah, and well, the painting was still a lot, I guess,’ she said.

‘But I’m serious you’re not listening to me, don’t let this, me, hold you back.’

‘Okay, I’ll go,’ I said. ‘But by the time I’m back, I hope you’ve got a whole other gallery worth of paintings ready for me,’ I said. She smiled.

‘Of course.’

I felt eyes on me, as I looked to my left the security guard who had let me in was standing at the door, ready to knock off.

‘But first, can I take you somewhere.’

‘Where?’ she asked.

‘How about some ice-cream?’ I said.