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"Never," he rasped. "Never that. He's earned his rest. He's earned far more than I gave him at this bitter end. I left him half-dead with threats lurking all around."
"Then let me help. I can make it painless. He'll just go to sleep."
"We'll be within striking distance of the castle tomorrow. You can't spare an ounce of your power if you're still bent on the same plan."
"I am."
"Then I will end this." Aric placed the tip of one sword against the steed's chest. To Thanatos, he whispered, "Good-bye, my old friend. Rest well." Aric plunged the sword.
The horse shrieked, and I could have sworn Thanatos looked . . . betrayed. Was he wondering why his golden-haired knight would forsake him? After all his unending service?
Thanatos's red eyes flickered. Once. Twice.
They closed forever.
Aric's stoic facade never faltered, but I could sense his utter agony. He must be drowning in guilt and grief.
I put my hand on his armored shoulder. "I'm so sorry."
He inclined his head, couldn't seem to find words.
Jack said, "I'll help you bury him. Evie, it's too cold for you out here."
"I'll be fine."
"We doan know if more Baggers will smell the blood."
Aric absently said, "It isn't safe."
Jack squired me back to the truck, then helped me into the cab. Under his breath, he said, "Let him grieve without having to be in protection mode." He was right.
"Okay. I will."
Jack closed the door behind him. After fetching a shovel from the nearly-full truck bed, he secured a burial spot.
From their body language, I could tell Aric insisted on digging the grave, no doubt wanting to punish himself.
As he buried his horse, Jack stowed the tackle, armor, and saddlebags among the many boxes he'd loaded up from the cave. Joining me inside the truck, he pulled his flask from his coat. At the rim, he said, "Thought I'd give the Reaper some space too."
I nodded. "He shared a bond with Thanatos for longer than I've been alive. On his card, Death is astride a stallion. Now he's a knight with no steed." Death was incomplete. "Aric loved that horse, yet he ran him into the ground and didn't even spare a sword strike to euthanize him."
"Which means the Reaper was out of his head to reach you." Another swig. "Damn him."
"Damn him," I echoed.
"So much harder to hate him."
"Welcome to my world."
"What are we goan to do with him?"
"Hell if I know. But I don't want to hurt him anymore." I deeply regretted flying off the handle in the cave. "He must have already been crumbling inside because of what he did to me, and then I piled it on last night. Now this."
"It's not your fault. You've been through a lot. You're doing the best you can in a shit situation."
"It's worse than you think. Jack, when Aric's powers first manifested, he accidentally killed innocent people--including his parents. His mom was pregnant at the time."
Jack swore low.
"For him to have come so close to ending me and Tee . . ." I trailed off when Aric turned toward us, trudging back.
His eyes were dim and glinting, his shoulders heavy.
Jack muttered, "Never thought I'd say this, but il tombe en botte. The Reaper is falling to ruin."
When Aric rejoined us, he had a frozen track down his cheek. A tear.
Oh, Aric. The pain I felt convinced me that I was still as deeply in love with him as I'd ever been.
Did that mean I was right back where I'd started with both of them? Without thought, I placed my hand on his cheek and gave him a sympathetic expression.
In a pained tone, he rasped, "A touch and a soft look. I am felled."
Jack tensed beside me, breaking the spell.
47
Day 586 A.F.
I couldn't believe I'd agreed to come to this place.
As the truck meandered up the snowy drive to the cabin where Aric and I had first had sex, emotions churned inside me.
Yes, it was strategically located with a generator, a small kitchen, and running water. We would be able to grab a shower and cook some of the food we'd transported from the cave. For the first time in months, I'd have a real bed to sleep in.
But the cabin also held way too many memories.
When Aric had first suggested it, I'd said, "It's less than a day's drive from the castle. How close will the sphere be?"
"Some distance away. And that haze might even have contracted with my absence." Over the long drive, Aric had seemed to bury his grief over Thanatos, at one point saying, You live. That's what matters. But he was still running on empty.
"Or not. Aric, the risk . . ."
"Sieva, I will never be taken by it again."
He and Jack had both looked exhausted, so I'd acquiesced, even while wondering if I could handle what this place meant to me.
Aric parked in front. The cabin was built into the side of a mountain with a nearby stable. The last time I'd ridden here, Thanatos had been inside.
The enormous satellite dish came into view, illuminated by the continual lightning overhead. Were pieces of my clothing still littered around the base?
"Look at that dish!" Jack exclaimed. "Does it work?"
"Alas, it does not." Catching my gaze, Aric murmured, "A hailstorm damaged it beyond repair."
My cheeks heated. His face was flushed as well. So we were both replaying the details of that night?
Tee had probably been conceived here. Had Aric put that together? When his attention dipped to my belly, I had my answer.
Jack climbed out, bow at the ready. As he helped me down, I couldn't meet his gaze. Coming here had been a mistake.
Outside of the cabin, I was about to voice more opposition, but Aric said, "It's safe here. It's comfortable. Battle comes tomorrow, and this is a strategic point of departure. Allow me to enter first and ensure that no one--or thing--has taken up residence."
My wide-eyed look told him: Ensure it doesn't look like a love nest.
A couple of minutes later, Aric gestured from the door, and Jack and I followed him inside. I peeked into the back room. Aric had used his supernatural speed to make the bed and straighten up. He could have flaunted what had gone on here, but he was being a gentleman about it.
If the cave had reminded me of my rage toward Aric, this place reminded me of promises. I vividly recalled the way it had felt to stroke the blond stubble on his defined jaw. The way his lips had covered mine, demanding everything from me. The way he'd tried to explain his feelings--clumsily, because he'd had no experience with things like that.
As he tossed wood into the fireplace, Jack explored the radio equipment on the desk. "How'd you find this place, Reaper?"
"I commissioned the dish and the cabin to be constructed before the Flash." In moments, he had a fire going. "I suspected communications would fall with the beginning of the game."
"So you had an alternate site of your own."
"Yet I foolishly didn't provision it."
Jack thumped the copper covering the walls, then turned to inspect the maps of constellations. "How much did something like that dish cost? Millions?" When Aric didn't deny it, Jack said, "So you were a multimillionaire?"
Shrug.
Perceptive Jack narrowed his eyes. "Billionaire, then?"
"For all the good it's doing me now."
"Jesus. Can't even wrap my head around that much money."
Aric leaned his armored shoulder against the wall. "I would have given up every penny not to be immortal."
Jack's smile was bitter. "You can say that 'cause you've never been poor."
"And you can say that because you've never lived forever."
With a contemplative look, Jack gave a nod, and something seemed to pass between them.
As different as the two men were, they had more than me in common. They shared a rapport that they likely both hated. But it was there, all the same.
God,
I loved them both.
Jack turned from the desk. "I'm goan to grab some food for us."
Once the door closed behind him, I said, "Aric, I don't like this. Coming here feels underhanded. I hate keeping secrets from Jack."
"I don't like it either. But this made sense."
"Still, I--oh!" My eyes went wide. I felt that fluttering inside, stronger than ever. Relief swamped me, and my eyes pricked with tears. Decided to stick around, kid?
"What is it?" Aric hurried beside me.
I peered up at him. "Tee's kicking. I worried he'd been lost. That was part of the reason I freaked out so bad in the cave."
"May I?" He tugged off his gauntlet.
