Page 47 of Axton
“Koty said all the men had jobs. Most of them own real estate offices, real estate appraisals, and insurance offices. I wonder if he plans to funnel money through these small businesses. It's the perfect setup.” Bolton said.
“Jeremiah builds tiny homes, and I wonder if his father didn’t own a construction company. There are well known contractors that hire companies who employ illegals and take responsibility for it. That could be how he got into contact with the cartel. They put a bounty on Koty’s head as well.” I said.
Creed spoke up. “Alright, we can dream up theories all night, but we won’t know anything for sure until we do the research. For now, all we can do is vote on Magnus’s request for a level red lockdown. There’s already a cartel presence in Southern Indiana thanks to the Devil’s Rejects, and I can see a legitimate risk here. The cartel has been way too patient, and I don’t see that lasting, especially now. My vote is yes, we need to lockdown.”
Everyone agreed.
That meant I had work to do, and I wasn’t sure if it would be too late to check on Belle. Dammit, there was a small army outside the gates that wanted her, and I lived way across the lake from her apartment.
Chapter Nineteen
Belle
Inever wore slacks in my life, unlike the women in our northern communities. When it got cold they could wear pants under their dress as long as their husband gave their approval. It was because it got cold up there and many lived on farms. A pair of jeans was a completely different experience for me. Valerie said they fit me perfectly, but they were uncomfortable. I hoped when my injuries healed they would feel better to wear. That was just the physical part of wearing them, but I also felt exposed. The sweater was soft, but it hugged my body, and I was used to wearing baggy dresses and not showing off my figure. I chose jeans because I was always curious about them, but once I was in them I felt exposed. Men always looked at me with lust in their eyes, but that was while wearing the least flattering dresses. I hesitated when I walked down those stairs at Morgan’s house. But then my eyes met Michael’s and his warmth surrounded me, making me feel safe and something else I couldn’t explain. He didn’t exactly look at me with lust in his eyes, maybe a little, but it was something else. Almost like he adored me or something. Creed didn’t look at me with lust like the other men either. He was more surprised than anything, I think.
Then that smell hit me, and it smelled like the dead animals on the side of the road mixed with the sulfur of rotten eggs and a hint of skunk spray. I am normally a hard worker, but when the mobile home was being loaded, I made it look like I was working really hard stacking the bags in the bedroom, so I didn’t have to go back inside that monster sized house.
I was amazed by the winter wonderland I saw as we drove to the Community Center. I barely heard all the cheesy things Valerie said about love and all that, I was too mesmerized to listen to it. The people were so happy as they celebrated their holiday. We never celebrated, it was against the ancestor’s laws, and I regretted that as I watched the children, and their parents experience the purest kind of joy.
When we walked into the community center, I was amused when I heard Axton snarl at some young man that looked at me the way I hated. It was either a snarl spoken under his breath or a growl, I couldn’t tell. He introduced us to a very kind woman named Heidi. I hated it when Axton kissed my temple then walked away after telling me I was in good hands. We spent a lot of time with her. She had paperwork for us to sign, and a welcome packet for us to study. It explained how Creed’s lake worked. She gave us the highlights and explained how to purchase things, receive mail, participate in community sports and what was offered in the training center. Then she gave us a tour and I was once again amazed. She put us in a small vehicle she called a side by side, and drove us around to see the little grocery store and gas station she called the commissary. Then we saw the miniature hospital, training center, the school they were building, and the beach. Then she took us back to the community center and picked up some food before taking us to the apartment building.
I felt alone and scared without Michael and wasn’t looking forward to my first night without him. There were a lot of people around and new rules to learn.
Our apartment was very nice. It had a view of the lake if we stood outside on the balcony. We were on the top floor, and we could see it over the trees. We had a kitchen, furnished living room with a television which was the most exciting part of the apartment, a hall bathroom and two bedrooms, both with their own bathrooms. There were so many bags of clothes in my room that I could barely see the bed or floor, with some left in the hall as well. I wasn’t going to need new clothes for the rest of my life if I somehow got to feeling comfortable wearing what Morgan gave me.
Koty and I enjoyed dinner while Heidi made a run to the commissary for things she thought we would need. The coolest part was that we could watch television while we ate. It was a good distraction that kept my mind off of my fear and what was happening back home. I was sad and disappointed that I wouldn’t see Michael again, and didn’t know how long until I got to see him before bed. I didn’t get to say goodbye before we left the community center. I really hoped I would see him the following day at some point.
When Heidi returned, she had a lot of stuff for us. She even bought briefs, razors, and shaving cream for Koty. All the bathrooms already had toilet paper, hand soap, and towels, but she brought me a few things I never used before. The most confusing thing was razors. She expected me to shave all the hair under my arms and on my legs. It was weird but I’d do it if she thought it was necessary. Store bought shampoo and conditioner was new to me. We always used the homemade deodorant, soap and shampoo one of my father’s wives made.There was body lotion, hand lotion, body spray, and other things I never used. Except lotion, I did have some of that, but it was always unscented. I never used conditioner in my life either, and it smelled really good. Then she had a brush, some hair ties and clips, and something else I never used and that was a curling iron. She handed me actual women’s shaving cream and explained how to use the razor on my legs, then she handed me a little box of band aids. Heidi felt it was important for me to acclimate to the world around me, and we agreed to start with making my appearance more modern. I agreed, because I realized being too plain would make me stick out more.
She was a thorough woman because she put tampons and pads in my bathroom vanity cabinet. I had never used those, we were to use reusable pads back home. We even had designated underwear for that time of the month. They were made much thicker and had clasps for the menstruation pads to stay in place. She was totally baffled when I told her I never used a tampon, but I did see them in the women’s restrooms at the community college I attended before switching to the online program for my bachelors.
While I took a shower, she dug through Morgan’s bags for a nightgown and robe. Heidi was very kind and didn’t seemed surprised at all there were a lot of things she may have considered usual that I didn’t know.
My legs felt oddly weird but good. They were soft and felt extra clean. I did get a few cuts, and it took me a very long time, but I think I liked it. I cleaned my wounds and put on new dressings.
When I walked out of the bathroom, I saw what was laying on my bed. Heidi moved all the bags off it, so I had somewhere to sleep. What was on my bed was not the kind of nightgown I expected. It was a blush liquid satin gown with tiny straps and no sleeves.Beside it was a robe that matched. I touched it and it felt silky and soft. I loved it. I had seen nightgowns similar in some of the movies I watched during our travels.
After Heidi left and Koty retired to his room, it was quiet and every tiny noise I heard panicked me into thinking it was Jeremy, and he hurt people to find me. I needed Michael and he was nowhere near me. I shut my bedroom door and drew the curtains to block out the blinding billions of Christmas lights outside, then shut off my light. I was going to arrange my things the next day because I really needed to turn my lights off.
I didn’t feel hidden enough on my bed, so I crawled to the corner of the bedroom and curled up into a ball. I cried because I knew my papa was dead, my mama was probably taken from her home and sent north to a new husband, and Koty and I were being hunted. The most horrible thoughts were going through my mind. Papa burning in hell, Jeremy forcing himself on me if I was found, Koty being killed by him, and not ever feeling safe again the way Michael made me feel. I couldn’t stop crying and fear took hold of me from the deepest parts of my soul. My body was trembling, and I couldn’t get the room dark enough because of all the twinkling lights outside. I wanted to go home to my papa and mama. I missed my students and the rest of my family.
Axton
I paced my living room floor while thinking about Belle. I imagined her lying in bed with blankets over her because she couldn’t get the room dark enough. Fucking Morgan and all those damn lights. My house was too quiet, and nothing took my mind off Belle. Was she suffering because I wasn’t near? Was she sad because I didn’t get to tell her goodnight? Was Koty smart enough to give her comfort or did he just go to bed and leave herto her thoughts? Did Heidi show her how to get to the bunker from her apartment?
Dammit, I tried watching television and that didn’t calm my mind down. There were a few foreign cases that needed assigned to units, so I worked on that, but I couldn’t get rid of the fucking gut feeling I had that told me someone needed me. Dammit, I hadn’t felt that feeling in years, not the way I felt when the guys were on missions that went south, or when I had to leave Kayla for basic training. It was all fucking Natalie. I hadn’t felt it since Natalie. Fuck!
Fourteen years ago…
Getting over the girl you loved your whole life was hard. It was even harder when you saw her every single day and had to play the role of best friend. Natalie hurt me, and she hurt me bad. Gone were the days she looked at me as if I had all the answers in the world. She was still near, and I could have sworn she felt the same way about me as I did her, but I was wrong. She was still the Natalie I knew in many ways, but she changed in many other ways. I had her to lean on and God knew she leaned on me, but the playfulness was gone. It had been too long since I heard her hilarious laugh or saw excitement in her eyes. It was like the light in her eyes died overnight. I came so damn close to telling her that I loved her with every ounce of my being. I wanted her to be mine, to be her boyfriend and not just her best friend. That she was the person who taught me everything we wanted when we got off that mountainside was worth getting up every day and fighting damn hard for it. And damn did I have to fight hard every single day of my life. Most guys on that mountainside had two choices at my age. Not me, I made myself another choice and I was fighting damn hard to stay on track for that choice. Icould have chosen to be like Natalie’s older brothers and most kids my age on that mountain and dropped out of school to tinker around on old cars, drink beer and get high all day, and of course make meth with your piece of shit parents, and make welfare babies with any girl that spread their legs for them. Then there was option two, which was to run away and live on the streets but still eventually get into drugs. Those two options were pretty much the norm, but I wasn’t the normal guy. I dreamed up my own path, and that was to join the military and go to college on the GI Bill, marry Natalie, and send money home to Kayla. She was getting old enough to start doing things for herself. I prepared her for the day I would have to leave. She knew how to use my bank card, how to pay bills, what to do if mom got arrested again, and how to fix things around the house. I promised of she did good in school and got accepted into college, I’d do whatever I could to help her. I wanted to be a pilot, but that wasn’t something that would give me an immediate income. I couldn’t understand what was wrong with Natalie, and why she made me feel ecstatic to have one special night with her, but then act like she was doing me a favor. It felt like our friendship and all of our hopes and dreams were slipping through my fingers for several months.
I couldn’t understand how it was possible to love someone so much that it motivated you to rise above your circumstances and work the way I did, but not receive that love in return. It was in her eyes one day then it just up and disappeared.
It happened the day prior. I took off work early, which was something I never did. It was Valentines Day, so I got her some flowers and a box of chocolate. I wasn’t really all that in tune on how to impress a girl, but the guys at the tire shop said to always give them flowers and candy. I went home and got a shower, making sure I scrubbed every bit of grease off me because itwas like that shit stained. I threw on the only button up shirt I had with my best pair of jeans, styled my hair and put on the tie I found at the secondhand store while picking up a few things for Kayla. I even spent the extra two dollars on the Old Spice deodorant I picked up. I thought it made me smell like my mom’s brother who did well for himself. Maybe I hoped it covered the smell of the cheap laundry detergent we used and the stench of poverty people in town made me believe it existed.
After taking one last look in the mirror and checking out the only few hairs that grew on my face then deciding to shave them off real quick, I whistled as I walked to the kitchen table for her flowers and candy then went toward the front door. I stopped myself as soon as I opened the door, and I felt like someone punched me in the gut. Natalie was getting into the passenger side of a very familiar Toyota Camry. The one Will Caston drove to school. The one his parents bought him brand new straight off the lot. Will Caston, the biggest asshole in the school. The one that was a bully and got off by making everyone laugh at the more unfortunate kids. We had plans, I was on my way to her house so I could escort her back to my house, and we were going to make a Valentines dinner with Kayla. I was going to tell her everything I needed to say after Kayla went to bed. She knew about our plans for the evening and acted excited at first. But then she acted weird at school, like she was making time for me, and it was a favor she was doing for me. What happened?
Another piece of my heart fell away when she waved at me as they drove by. I didn’t do a damn thing to stop her, just let her get in the car with him and drive away, despite the horrible feeling I had, like she was going to need me. Like she was walking into the wolves’ den and I just let it happen. I looked at my bicycle and cursed. I fucked up, because I couldn’t even go find her. I couldn’t afford a car, not even a cheap one. Althoughmom had been doing better, she was working at a bar and still not coming home every night. She had a piece of shit car she bought, but it just added to my problems because I had to spend money to buy parts and spend time fixing it. She was paying some bills, which helped, and I was able to buy the flowers and chocolates, but that was about it.
