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There was a pause, and his eyes became dark just before he looked away. “Don’t know my father. And my mother left when I was a child. Guess you would say she wasn’t protective at all. Unless protecting herself counts,” he snarled.
I could feel the resentment within him. But from what Anya told me, they had no idea why she left.
“I’m very sorry. That must have been very difficult for you and your brother,” I said.
“Unfortunately, not all that uncommon here in Tabiq.”
Anya had mentioned that as well. “Not to defend your mother's actions or those of the others, but maybe there were good reasons for them leaving? Maybe they did it for their children?”
Anya had said that if she hadn’t left, what was tearing her up inside would’ve eventually landed on the children. She recalled one day feeling so broken inside that she knew she needed to leave to give them a chance of a normal life because what was happening to her, wasn’t ever going to end.
“I am a few years younger than Orion, but when I asked what he remembers about our mother leaving, this is what he said. He had come into the house and asked her to play with us. She refused and he continued to ask, hoping that if he pushed enough, she would give in. But he got the same answer. As a kid, he was brutally honest and asked, ‘Mommy, why can’t you smile and have fun with us like Grandmother?’ I think it was two or three days later that she left and never returned.” Mayson paused for a moment before continuing. “Orion never speaks about it, but I know he feels as though it was his fault. I know it wasn’t. Even when she was here, she really wasn’t here, if you know what I mean.”
“I do. Kind of. But you’re right. It is not Orion’s fault. I’m glad you see that.”And I hope one day you see that it isn’t all her fault either. “Have you ever tried finding her?” I asked.
“Why would I want to? She knows where she left us. If she cared, she would’ve reached out, if not returned.” The words were coming out of his mouth, but I could see the pain still in him. He wanted her, he just was angry that he did. “Orion would never admit it, but I think he tried looking for her when he was younger. Now, neither of us speaks about her. And if you hadn’t asked, I’d have been okay with going on the rest of my life not doing so.”
I didn’t believe that for a second. He might not want to think about her, but he did. And knowing how much she loves her boys, and this only made this trip even more important. If I had to scrap and borrow, I would’ve found a way here just so that the letter can be delivered. They needed to know the real reasonwhy she left. I just wish she’d shared what was in the letter with me, because I am counting on it answering all the questions they might have.
“I didn’t mean to bring up such pain. But sometimes talking about things like this helps.”
He laughed. “Sure. So does whacking your thumb with a hammer.”
“Point taken. Changing the subject.”
“Good. Let’s talk about you. What made you want to become a nurse?” he asked.
He had been open when speaking with me, so now it was my turn. “I was lucky to have a close relationship with my parents, but my mother was gone a lot. My grandfather had been very ill for a long time, and she would travel to stay with my grandparents to help care for him. A few times she took me along with her. I guess watching him slowly getting worse made me feel helpless. All I could do was sit quietly. When he died, I made a vow to myself that if I ever had to care for someone who was sick again, I was going to be able to do a lot more than just sit. And hence why I went to nursing school.”
“I felt the same way when my grandfather died. Helpless, I mean. Instead of it driving me to medical school, I think it put up walls. I had been very close with him, and after that, didn’t want to ever get that close to anyone again,” he admitted. Then he shot me an accusing look. “How the hell do you do that?”
“Do what?” I asked, innocently.
“Get me to talk about shit I don’t want to?”
“Maybe it’s because you feel comfortable doing so with me, just like I do with you. No one has ever asked me why I wanted to be a nurse. You’re the first person I admitted it to. I’m glad I did,” I stated.
The waitress brought over his lamb stew and my salad. When she left, he said, “I guess that is enough sharing for one day. Let’s eat. You have a book waiting and I have to go pick up Orion.”
We hardly spoke during dinner, but I knew why. The walls he mentioned were starting to crumble and he was doing everything he could to keep them from collapsing. Now it was my job to ensure that didn’t happen. Thankfully, tomorrow I was going to be his date, and we’ll have a lot more time together.
CHAPTER 8
Mayson
“Orion don’t tell me you’re wishing you were with the ladies right now,” I said, as we sat down on the couch drinking beer.
“No. I needed time away.”
That didn’t sound good. “Second thoughts?”
“Yes. But not about marrying Raya. More about why I agreed for Kathy to stay with us for two weeks. I think I’m going to go crazy. I thought you talked a lot. You two are nothing alike.”
I laughed. “I told you that before. It’s too late now. It’s not like you can ask her to leave without causing issues between you and Raya. Looks like you’re just going to have to suffer through it.”
“Or you can ask her to stay here with you. You have room,” he said.
“All I have for a guest to sleep on is a fucking couch! And how can I put this? Hell no! You might be my brother, and I would do almost anything for you, but no way in hell am I doing that,” I said firmly.
