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When our orgasms subside, Viktor collapses beside me, pulling me into his arms and kissing the top of my head. The warmth of his body is like a security blanket, and I curl up against him, nuzzling his chest and sighing contentedly.
“Thank you, Sage,” he whispers, his voice soft and gentle.
“For what?” I ask, looking up at him.
“For reminding me that you’re my wife, not my property. You have a mind of your own, and you’re not going to just submit to me. I shouldn’t have treated you the way I did,” he says.
“It’s alright. We’ll figure it out together,” I tell him, feeling warm inside at his apology. He’s finally showing signs of warming up to having a real partnership.
“That’s what marriage is about, isn’t it?” he says.
I nod.
He’s right. That is what marriage is about.
20
Viktor
Ithought I only wanted Sage to have my child, the next heir to the most powerful Bratva in the area, and that marriage was a formality to achieve that, but she’s taught me that my desires can change in an instant.
As she lays her head on my chest and I feel her silky hair flow over my skin, I feel a peace I haven’t felt in a long time. It brings back more memories of my childhood, but this time, they’re good ones.
Those summer nights in Russia were more beautiful than any I’ve seen in America. They were much quieter, without all the bugs, but they were still warm. Nobody wanted to work when it was nice outside, but my father was running a bar, so he’d have twice as much business on those days.
I used to just run around in the park across the street with my sister, Daria. She was older than me, and much more clever. Sheused to get us into all kinds of trouble, but our mother would talk our father out of a beating when we got home.
She was too soft with us, but we loved her for it.
After a long day of getting into trouble, when we went to sleep, our little bodies would be so tired that we’d fall asleep in an instant. Even the excitement for tomorrow couldn’t keep us up.
It’s how I feel now with Sage snuggled up to me in bed, only I can’t fall asleep. I feel that I need to speak to her about my past, the things I’ve kept hidden, so she’ll understand why I am the way I am.
Now, I want her to understand. Before, I didn’t care. That’s changed, and I hope she can appreciate that I’m making an effort, however terrible I might be otherwise.
“You asked what was bothering me today,” I begin, trying to think of a way to bring this up without creating another argument.
“You don’t have to talk about it. I’m sorry I pushed you,” she says.
It hurts my heart that she’s always so quick to apologize. I’m always making her out to be the one who is wrong, but in reality, I’m the bad one. I’ve always been the one who should be apologizing, but that’s difficult for me to do. It feels like I’m failing at being the strong man everyone needs me to be.
“Don’t say sorry, please,” I say, stroking Sage’s silky hair. “You deserve the truth. It’s just difficult for me to talk about things, especially when I don’t understand them so well myself.”
She snuggles closer. “Well, you’re doing your best, and that’s what matters.”
I laugh softly. “I’m not sure if I really am doing my best. A lot of this is new to me. Feeling this way is new. You’re new.”
“Surely, you’ve been with other women before,” she says, tilting her head up to look at me.
“Nobody who’s even come close to you, darling,” I assure her.
“That’s awfully sweet of you,” she says, tracing her finger over the tattoos on my ribcage. “I’m not sure I believe it, though. A man like you probably has a lot of experience.”
“Are you calling me a whore?” I ask with a chuckle.
“Oops, did I say that?” she teases.
“Not exactly, but it was implied.”
