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“Language, Ralph,” Tracey said as she sidestepped us to open the front door. “You’re always welcome here. Just call your parents and let them know.”
She let herself in and I stood, watching my breath leave my mouth in clouds amidst the cold air.
Ralph stood. “You all right with it?”
“Only if you don’t bitch at me,” I said with a chuckle, clapping my free hand over his shoulder.
When he smiled, I wanted to sigh. As much as I liked Ralph, I hated when I felt like I didn’t know what was going on with him. I didn’t feel entitled to the details of his life. I figured it’d come with time. If he needed me, he’d let me know. If he needed space, he’d stop coming around. I could only follow his lead.
“Look,” he started as he entered my room, rubbing his hands over his face. “Shit, I don’t know. I don’t like that you’re going, but I’m proud of you. Always have been.”
I nodded, unsure if I should respond.
“That accident changed a lot of things. But I’m glad I have you, Dex. Don’t forget that, even when I do.”
He sat on my bed and I sat at the desk, spinning my chair to face him. “We’re fine in my book,” I said.
He looked up and laughed. “I guess that’s all that matters. Where’s the remote? Can’t miss the game just because my mom is on my ass.”
I tossed it to him and sat back, content.
And I wondered,did I have someone like Ralph in my old life?
I sure hope so.
Dexter
Don’t losesight of your purpose. Find her. Bring me light. Give me hope.
I was used to waking up slowly, the words following me like a whisper. But this morning, I woke like I was a light switch someone turned on, the words coming to me like someone said them right into my ear.
I sat up, realizing I was up a full half hour before my alarm was set to go off. Monday had come like a bullet—fast and full of dread.
Find her?
I didn’t know anyone besides Ralph in that school. Tracey wasn’t exactly the best person to bring this to. She freaked out at the thought of meleavingthe house, let alone going on a journey to find the love of my life.
Sessie.
I didn’t know much about her other than her optimism when it came to things pertaining to life and heaven. She seemed sweet, but after some thought, I decided I had to do this alone.
It could take years. I was slow, this body still healing from being hit by a car. Luck definitely wasn’t on my side. At this rate, I’d never find her.
Are we even in the same state? The same country?
My door creaked open and Tracey walked in with two mugs. “Oh, you’re awake.” She set one down on my nightstand. “I thought I’d leave this here for you when you got up. Help ease your nerves. Or mine. Whatever.” She shrugged and took a sip of her coffee.
“Do you think soulmates exist, Tracey?” My voice was rough and sleepy, but I was eager to hear her response.
“Hmm…I don’t know how to answer that. On one hand, I’m a woman who likes to think so. I’m not exactly a young gal anymore. I don’t have dreams of gallivanting off into the sunset with Brad Pitt. On the other hand, I have a teenager asking me this question. You’ll find fault in anything I say.”
“No.” I shook my head. “I’m not asking so I can make fun of you. I’m asking because I genuinely want to know what you think.”
She looked at me with curiosity before sitting at my desk and setting her mug down. She sat forward and hunched her shoulders a bit, looking up at the ceiling in thought. “I’ve always wanted to believe it. But what about the people who stay alone their whole lives? I don’twantto believe it because what if I end up like them? It isn’t something I’m fit to live with. I crave partnership. But what if, by some stroke of bad luck, I miss him? What then?” She paused. “I guess I do think we have soulmates. Does everyone end up with theirs? I don’t think so. But, because I’m greedy, I hope we both do.”
I liked her answer more than I was willing to admit.
“Enough talk about soulmates and your crazy aunt not wanting to be alone. Let’s get you ready for your first day back. Have you picked out your clothes already? You used to always do that ahead of time. Quite the old man, you were.” She muttered the last bit to herself.
