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47
Roan
Day after day,I laid in the same position, staring at the same city skyline, until it was time to go home.
Frankie and Freddy alternated shifts at the hospital, sitting in my room, talking a million miles a minute about anything and everything. I didn’t hear a word of it.
Instead of taking me to my parents’ house, they planned on taking me to theirs. My parents didn’t even know what happened. I didn’t want them to. It was bad enough the Starlings knew, but since Frankie was listed as my emergency contact I had zero control over the hospital calling her while I was fucking unconscious.
I still hadn’t said a word to anyone, despite the efforts of various people. Frankie, obviously. The doctors, nurses, and cops again. They even brought in a trauma counselor to try and talk to me;trybeing the keyword.
The only person who wasn’t hounding me was Sasha. After promising to kill everyone, he left and never came back. For all I knewhewas dead — or gone.
It was fine. It was what he wanted all along. He did his job for his shitty boss and now it was time for him to move on. Wasn’t that his plan? Go to Russia, get married, and breed little criminal killers just like him so the cycle of violence could continue?
Forget I exist.
“So we’ve got the guest room all set up,” Frankie yammered while Freddy wheeled me toward the front door like the invalid I was. “Freddy packed a bag of your stuff, told your mom where you were going to be, and then of course,ourmom found out and told Consuela to make all of your favorites while you’re there. But not over the top. Your doctor said you’re on a restricted diet.”
Freddy elbowed her at about the same time I closed my eyes and hid my face behind my hand. How fucking mortifying. I was furious when I found out they knew about my surgery. Even without revealing details, it was goddamn humiliating.
“Oh, shit,” Freddy murmured. “He’s still here.”
“Stubborn motherfucker,” Frankie hissed beside him.
We stopped moving suddenly. I dropped my hand and looked up, surprised to see Sasha standing in the way. So hehadn’tleft…
“I told you to stay the fuck away from him!” Frankie yelled.
Sasha did what he did best — ignored her. He closed the distance between us in long strides and took a knee next to me. At least he wasn’t in a suit this time — back to his regular jeans and fitted black t-shirt. He didn’t reach for me or say a word. He just knelt there, leaning on the knee that was still upright, looking at me, like a knight awaiting a command from his king.
I wouldn’t meet his gaze, no matter how intensely he stared. I located a giant fleck in the tile in front of me and latched onto it. My whole existence was in that fleck, and as long as I didn’t look away from it, I’d be ok. I could pretend the rest of the world didn’t exist.
“We should really get him home,” Freddy said quietly.
Sasha didn’t budge.
“Don’t make me call security,” Frankie snapped.
“Solnyshko,” Sasha whispered, dipping his head even lower to try and catch my gaze. “Please.”
My breath caught in the back of my throat. In the time we’d spent together, Sasha never said please.Never. Not to me, not to anyone. He might as well have been begging me.
I forced my gaze away from the tile. It landed on his hand, tattooed and scarred, clenched into a fist so tight the veins and tendons popped beneath his skin.
His chest rose and fell quicker, drawing my attention upward. The muscles in his throat tensed, like they used to when we first met, a sign I now recognized as restraint.
Finally, I gave him what he wanted — I looked at him.
He didn’t say anything. He didn’t have to. The look in his eyes said it all. Fury, agony, despair.
Not pity.
Not disgust.
The world tilted. My vision blurred until Sasha was nothing more than a wash of color. Tremors wracked my body. I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t move.
It wasn’t until Sasha’s arms wrapped around me that I knew I’d fallen. I buried my face into his shoulder, trying to muffle my sobbing against him. He stood up, holding me upright with one arm around my torso. His other hand alternated between holding the back of my head and running his fingers through my hair.
