AllFreeNovel
Share Us
I nod. She is sitting on the end of the single bed where I have been lying all day. Unable to move. Not able to function.
“Honey, the boss has arranged for you to go and stay somewhere new. It’s closer to your school. You will be taken care of there.”
My mind registers some of what she is telling me. “I am not staying here? My brothers are here.”
“Yes, honey. They think it is better if you aren’t in this house anymore. After what happened.”
“Why?” I ask, terrified of the idea of leaving the last place I saw my mother. The only place that reminds me of her. Terrified of leaving her behind.
“I don’t know honey, but it’s what the boss wants. He had a meeting with your brothers, and they have decided.” She puts a hand on my back to try comfort me. “Remember, it will be closer to your school, and you love school. You can focus on that. It will be good for you.”
I nod, I can’t even imagine studying ever again. I only have a year of high school left. I wanted to go to university. My grades are good enough to get a scholarship - but right now - it all seems pointless. I did that for my mom, to make her proud. Everything is for nothing without her.
But regardless of what I want, or think - the plans are in motion, and I just sit back and watch them as they pack my things into suitcases and prepare for me to be moved somewhere unknown. My brothers haven’t even bothered to come see me, even though they are in this house. They could decide to send me away, but they can’t look me in the eye and tell me themselves.
I’m scared, and numb.
My brothers are all staying here. And I don’t think it’s fair - but no one cares what I think. My mother is dead. My mother. She isgone. My heart will never heal from this. My life will never be the same. I will never be ok again.
All I can do is cry.
And it is all I do. I sit quietly, in the room opposite where I used to stay with my mother, and I cry. Day after day while they prepare to send me away.
I cry.
The other staff avoid me, or pretend they can’t hear me.
One evening I am sitting on the bed staring at the door, across the hall, to my mother’s room.
I don’t know how long I’ve been sitting there, but Tuomo appears, shoving my mother’s bedroom door open and storming inside. My heart aches I want him to close it. I haven’t looked inside since she died. The door has been closed.
Tuomo says my name.
I blink. Trying to process what is happening. He says my name again and then collapses to the floor.
I get up and walk across the hall, I haven’t seen him in days. I haven’t even thought about him to be honest. I haven’t thought about anything except my mother. Why is he here?
“Tuomo?” I whisper, and when he spins around and comes towards me, I tense up.
“I thought you were gone.” He says, dragging my stiff body into his arms.
“They had to deep clean this room. I was staying in the room across the hall.” Telling the story makes my throat tighten andmy words become too much to handle. A lump forms in my throat and again tears spill down my cheeks.
He holds me so tight that it hurts. But I like the pain. I like the constriction of being locked in his harms. “They are sending me away.” I tell him.
“I heard. I don’t want you to go.”
“I’m scared. I don’t even know where I’m going. I miss my mom—”
He strokes my head, and I wish he was rather holding me tight again. I want the pain instead.
“I will find you, little bird. Wherever they take you, I will find you. I promise you. Remember our pact. Ok. No matter what happens just remember the pact.”
He was talking, I wasn’t paying attention. I nod, because I don’t know what he said.
“Will you remember the pact, little bird?”
Oh. The pact. How can he think about that now? “I will.” I say, wondering if he cares about what happened to my mother. “I will remember it.”
