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I drew a ragged gasp that came out half wail.
My chest was tightening, making it hard to breathe.
I didn’t know how to make thatfit, and now shards of stupid Thistle were clattering to the floor, pieces of my mind I’d never be able to pick up and shove back in place.
“You were never supposed to leave me.”
I hugged myself, alone on the bathroom floor in Ace’s mansion.
I’d snuck again, but this morning had been the best ever—he’d woken with me in his arms, and then he’d claimed me. We’d lost ourselves for just a flash, a moment of bliss where everything was right.
And then…
I was alone in the bathroom, shards of glass around me. Pieces of a broken mirror.
So angry.
He’d been so angry that he’d lost control, he’d taken Bunny, and I was back there again.
It was that first night with Dan. Trying to hide my heat, so afraid of what was happening to my body.
I was so… so stupid. I hated how stupid I was. How much I didn’t know could happen. How much it hurt because I hadn’t yet learned what I was. I’d… expected more.
I’d thought if I told him I was afraid, he’d listen.
If I told him it hurt, he’d care.
If I told him I didn’t want to, he’d stop.
I screamed, clutching my hair, needing any pain to drag me from this place.
So stupid.
I hated who I’d been—that I’d ever been so stupid that I’d let it hurt. That I ever believed I deserved more.
It didn’t have to hurt—not like that. Bunny told me we didn’t have to care so much that we were made of glass. I tried to hug him close, to listen, but there was nothing but air.
No barrier between me and that stupid, stupid fucking whore who let it hurt so much.
I couldn’t breathe.
I needed Bunny?—
“Thistle.”
I’d never, in all my time with him, heard my name on Ace’s lips.
I’d never heard him afraid.
It drew me up, the world returning to focus. Kind of… tears blurred everything, but I saw him: slender form in the doorway, scatters of void-black hair fluttering about his glacier-blue eyes that were fixed on me.
He’d… he’d come back?
And… I frowned, nearing the surface again, almost able to take a breath.
He never used my name…
He was still at the door of the bathroom, knuckles white on the door frame, and in his other hand…
