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The emotions and memories that are in that place and associated with it, for them as well as for me, could have been the sparks that lit the fie.
In the house, I felt the chemistry. It crackled between all of us. We could all have been ready to make a move into something I can hardly believe is possible. And it felt like a moment. Something I may never be able to recreate.
And half of my mind is still stuck on what happened there today. The scents of the suits, their colognes, and the sweat and testosterone buzzing behind. The living force and hardness of muscle, and the raw lust I felt for each of them. But separately and even more, for all of them.
But, whatever that moment was made of, I need to reproduce it. I need to light that blaze, or rekindle it. Whatever. I need them. I need my men.
Right now, more than ever, though, most of all I need me.
Somehow, I have to get me back, and fast. Whatever it takes.
My instinct is to be decisive. To act. To take what I want and let the others deal with it however they can. But I want thesethree men. All of them. It’s more than that, even. They’re all perfect – perfectly imperfect – but all together they complete me. They each mean something different. Each of them balances and stimulates something in me.
I’m feeling my way. Perhaps I can simply command them. In a way they seem like they would be ready for that. But I want more. Their strengths, their forces of will, of muscle and of mind make a combination that’s much more than the sum of the parts.
Their rivalries and resentments, the struggles for power and dominance between the three of them, their competitiveness after my affection, that’s all part of it. A vital part.
I want all of them. Completely.
Together.
And I want them to want it as much as I do. To need it. To need and depend on each other, as much as they do me.
Okay, perhaps nearly as much.
We’re all in something together. I know that much. The sense that I have of what it is scares the hell out of me. And I still can’t see any details. The shape is coming, though. Alessio’s name rumbles and echoes deep inside me. The others will come.
But, from what fragments I heard, what they’ve been saying about docks and trucks and shipments, not to mention precincts, clubs and bars, I believe we have some very big business interests. And it sounds like they’re all in pretty big trouble.
I wonder how much of that is because of me.
Voices drift back. “We know that everyone’s going to be looking for us up Turtle rise. We can go back to Blackridge.”
“That’s still going to be the first place everyone thinks of looking when they don’t find us.”
“The hunting lodge is safe, or as safe as we can get right now.”
“Shame we can’t just say in the old house.” Voices rise, “I know, I know. I’m just saying. The defenses?—”
I call forward, “I need to think. Can you please be quiet.”
“But where–”
“Get us on a boat. Can you do that?”
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
Lady Giusiis a large luxury yacht, moored in the middle of a pier in a quiet marina. Or, as Alessio, the Emperor, says,“Small, for a superyacht.”
He hands the keys to the other two and as they go forward to the wheelhouse, they squabble about who’s going to pilot the her.
He and I settle onto the wide cushioned couches in the main cabin. He doesn’t want me out on deck. “Not while we’re in sight of land, at least.”
I agree. “Nice boat.” I tell him, as Whose is it? Is it yours? Mine?”
“Bit of a gray area.”
“More distressed property that you’ve been fortunate enough to rescue?”
