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He was nowhere near okay, but he nodded anyway. ‘Yeah, all good.’ A flurry of memories rushed back, of them cuddled up, their all-consuming kisses. ‘Sleep well?’
A quick heartbeat passed before she replied. ‘Yes, thanks.’
‘Good.’ He had to stop fantasising about getting her naked before it created a real problem. ‘Listen, Jess, about last night …’
‘It’s okay,’ she interrupted him. ‘I know it was a mistake. We shouldn’t have let our emotions get in the way.’
Emotions. So she really did still care for him. ‘I’m sorry, Jess, it won’t happen again.’ Feeble, but it was all he had right now.
‘I’m sorry too.’ She nodded. ‘Let’s get past it then, shall we?’
‘Yes, let’s.’ He cleared his throat and fought for something casual to say. ‘Do you remember how much time we used to spend in the saddle?’
‘Of course I do.’ A sentimental smile lifted the corners of her oh-so-kissable mouth. ‘I may be nine years older, but I’m not senile …’ she grinned, ‘… yet.’
‘Ha, no, you’re not …yet,’ he replied playfully, thankful for their easy banter. ‘I was wondering, would you like to go for a gallivant today?’
Her face lit up. ‘Would I ever!’
‘Great.’ His weary heart cartwheeled. ‘I’ll go get the horses saddled up, and be back to grab you in say,’ he glanced at his watch, ‘an hour, give or take.’
‘Sounds great, I’ll make sure I’m ready to go.’
Morgan headed outside, took a deep breath and then let it out slowly. He was glad Jess was handling what had happened the night before well, but he was still feeling the consequences of his actions. He knew he had to keep his emotions in check for the sake of their friendship, because if everything went belly up, he couldn’t imagine his life without her in it.
With Teeny at his side, he gathered both the horses from their paddocks and walked each over to the stables. Humming to himself, he brushed them down, checked their hoofs, and ensured their saddles were secure. Finally, both the horses were saddled up and ready to go. He headed back over to the homestead where Jess was waiting for him, dressed in tight-fitting jeans and a flannel shirt, her hair pulled back in a plait. He couldn’t help but feel a pang of regret for what he could never have with her. But he pushed it aside and greeted her with a smile.
‘Ready?’ he asked, his voice light.
‘More than ready,’ she replied, her eyes sparkling with excitement.
They walked together back to the stables, where he helped her up and onto her horse. Mounting Cash, he led her out and into the open. They set off at a leisurely pace, and the fresh air and stunning scenery did wonders for his spirits. As they rode side by side, talking and laughing like old times, it was easy to forget the awkwardness of the night before. He couldn’t help but feel grateful for moments like these, where he and Jess just enjoyed each other’s company.
‘Hey, Savage.’ She looked to him, a challenging glint in her eyes. ‘Race you!’
Before he could react, she shot forward, her laughter carrying.
She glanced over her shoulder and he pushed Cash a little harder. After crossing the first of two trickling creeks, they followed a hairpin curve that abruptly turned upwards. Lost in the moment, together, they rode like the wind, neck and neck towards the ridgeline. Earth flew from the horses’ hoofs as they neared the top, with Jess suddenly taking the lead. Wanting her to win, Morgan gave her a few seconds’ grace. She’d already dismounted by the time he reached her. And it was worth every bit of coming second, when her sassily triumphant grin set his heart on fire.
Dismounting and wandering to her side, he had to tear his eyes away from her for a moment.
Holding her hand up to shade her eyes, she smiled. ‘My god, I really do love it up here.’
Following her gaze out and over the land, he tugged the brim of his hat down. ‘Yeah, me too.’
‘There’s just something about not being able to see another living soul.’ Her expression faltered, but only for a breath. ‘Very unlike Florence, where there’s hustle and bustle most of the time.’
‘Well, you’re welcome, anytime, to come here and breathe, and so is Chiara, of course.’ Wrapping his arms around her, he cuddled her in nice and close while at the same time doing his best to convey that this was a friendly hug.
‘Thanks, Morgan, I reckon Chiara and I will take you up on that sometime.’ She pressed her cheek against him.
Taking comfort in the thought, Morgan also contemplated the fact that it felt as if she was home here, but it wouldn’t be for much longer, and the thought of her leaving shattered his buoyant heart into a million pieces. He couldn’t bear the idea of not having her by his side, to hold and cherish every moment they had left on this earth. But he knew he couldn’t be selfish enough to ask it of her – she had a life to live, dreams to chase, a daughter who needed her, all far away from here. Still, it didn’t stop him from wishing she could stay.
‘Should we head back?’ His gentle voice broke the comfortable silence.
‘Yeah, I reckon we should,’ she replied softly.
As they made their way back down the ridge, much more slowly than they’d climbed it, he couldn’t help but steal glances at her, taking in every detail of her face. Her beautiful eyes, the way her plaited hair fell perfectly over her shoulder, and the curve of her hips that he longed to hold onto. It was almost too much for him to bear. He knew he had to keep his feelings at bay, but with each passing moment it became harder and harder. He wanted her with every fibre of his being, to touch her, kiss her, love her in every way imaginable. But he knew it could never happen, not after what had transpired between them before. They’d had their chance. And it had been blown to smithereens.
