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I’m already in the shower, cleaning up. “I didn’t feed the kittens! He’s always asking about them, and I forgot!”
“The kittens are fine.” Zane peeks into the bathroom, fully dressed in his jeans and T-shirt. “I’ll feed Sky, and she’ll take care of her babies.”
“They’re eating solid food now, too!” I step out, grabbing a towel and quickly drying off.
“They’re also hunting mice.” He changes directions, walking to where I’m pulling on my underwear. “Eddie’s almost thirteen. I’m sure he’ll be okay a little longer.”
Standing up fast, I already recognize that look in his eyes. “As good as that sounds, I’d be worried about him the whole time.”
Leaning down, he kisses my lips. “We’ll be home in fifteen minutes.”
19
Zane
Walking from the house down to the restaurant after stopping off for a quick shower, I notice my universe seems to have shifted. I actually feel different. Garrett would be the first to point out I’ve had sex for the first time in who knows when, but it’s more than that.
My shoulders aren’t tense. In fact, all of the tension I’ve been carrying in my upper back and neck is noticeably absent. It’s like I’ve been released from a cage. My jaw isn’t tight, and I have a peculiar urge to smile.
It’s weird.
I feel good.
Stopping mid-way, I think about all the Buddhist philosophy I spent so much time studying in the hospital. I breathe deeply. I recall the idea of letting go of control. Is that what’s going on?
Lifting my eyes over the silvery tin roof of the restaurant, out to the bay, I study the horizon lit up from the recent disappearance of the sun. It’s not completely dark yet. The waterremains golden. In fact, the whole sky is a deep, blood-orange, and a lone, brown pelican glides just above the placid surface.
It sends my mind filtering through everything that happened today. The day was a freaking fever dream. Miss Gina drove away in that car, and we passed through a portal. I’m surprised I had the bearings to realize we had to return to the real world.
When we got to the house, as soon as I parked, Rachel had her hand on the door, ready to hop out of the Jeep to find her brother.
She leaned over to give me a quick kiss on the lips, but I caught her face, holding her still for a beat, holding her close for a better kiss, something a little slower, a little warmer. I wasn’t ready to let her go just yet. I didn’t want the vision to end.
She blinked up at me, and my chest tightened.
Rachel’s green eyes shine like the sun rising over the meadow when we take the horses out on a dewy spring morning. When I look into them, I see peace. The battle momentarily stops, and I escape the noise. I see something I’ve been afraid to allow myself to see.
She’s ripping my carefully crafted script to shreds. No attachments, no one gets hurt. It’s been my guiding principle since my injury. Don’t get too close. Never get too close.
Only, I can’t seem to stop myself. If today was any indication, I only want more of her. I don’t know what to do with this or what it means for the future. I’m all mixed up inside, because as relaxed and at peace as I am, I can’t help looking over my shoulder.
It’s the reality I’ve come to accept as soon as I think all is well.
“I love this kind of sunset.” Logan’s deep voice draws me out of my turmoil. “I’ve only ever seen it here.”
“It’s pretty,” I agree.
Although, not as pretty as the pair of green eyes I lost myself in all day long.
“I was thinking about our Thanksgiving show,” he continuesas we walk down to the Coot-Shoot. “The Pirates always have a game on Black Friday. We could ask Garrett to drop in and tell us what to expect.”
“They’re probably not headed to the Playoffs this year.” I glance at him, thinking about how the Pirates haven’t bounced back since he retired.
I know it weighs on him, but I’m not so sure my younger brother’s heart is in the game as much as it used to be either. Logan’s retirement seems to have started a chain reaction.
“Yeah, but we always get a bump when we have Garrett on the show. I think listeners like hearing you brothers talk.” He holds the door for me. “Maybe we could ask Jack to sit in as well. He’s really good on the mic, and I like including the local kids. He fielded a good team this year.”
“Jack’s good at everything.” I grin, thinking about my eldest brother.
