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“Thank fuck.”
five
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“Brick”—Ben Folds Five
The next morning, I drag Meghan and my sister down to the beach. The memories of my encounter with Chase last summer that still linger along the shore can’t compete with the memories of Dad in the house. Now that I’ve looked at his picture, I feel him everywhere, a ghost that’s waiting to get me alone so we can sit down for a conversation I never want to have.
I ripped the Band-Aid off with Chase a long time ago. I’ve known him so long that the memory of that night has been eclipsed by a hundred other memories of him. If anything, it’s humiliating to know my friend is so intimately acquainted with my body. I’m ready to replace that night with some ordinary days on the lake.
It’s warm and muggy out, but the water’s too cold for swimming, so we sit on the shore watching Lily dig a hole in the imported sand and exclaim in dismay when she hits gravel and rocks and mud a few inches down. That doesn’t deter her. She starts collecting pebbles in her strainer and washing them in the water. There’s hardly anyone out, just few people walking their dogs, and it’s peaceful on shore. After a while, Meghan starts texting her boyfriend, and I lie down on our blanket and doze off under the endless blue sky.
“Hottie alert,” Meghan says in her droll, uninflected tone, dragging me from my slumber. “One for you, one for me.”
“I’ve got enough boy drama at home,” I remind her. “Not to mention that the last time I was here I made the biggest mistake of my life.”
Meghan just rolls her eyes. “Which one do you want?”
I roll my head that way to humor her, not bothering to sit up. When I spot the two guys in swim trunks and hoodies walking towards us, one of them holding hands with a girl, I glare at her. “Very funny,” I say. “Are you giving me the one with a girlfriend?”
“Hey, it’s a little funny,” she says with a little grin.
“Whatever,” I say, closing my eyes again. “I’m taken. I have my sweet Toddy Bear.”
“Hey, you’re the one who wants to get laid while you’re here.”
“That is not what I said.”
She shrugs and slips a cigarette from her pack. “I made eye contact. They’ll come over. And you never know. You might them.”
“What, just because you made eye contact, he’s gonna come talk to you?”
“Well. Yeah.” She sounds like it’s the most logical thing in the world, inconceivable that he wouldn’t.
Apparently she’s right, because they head straight toward us. At first, they were too far off to see if they were cute, but up close, it’s impossible to miss. They’re both tall—and that’s not something I can say about many people—and I can tell they’re fit even in hoodies. Their black hair is messy on top, with a gradual fade to a buzz on the sides, and they both have the same pouty pink lips and thick dark lashes fringing their eyes, which are a striking color that’s as close to purple as blue. They’re not just obviously family, but identical except for their expressions.
The one holding hands is talking and laughing with the girl as he approaches, while the other hangs back a step, a frowndarkening his brow as he takes us in, clearly not too happy about being dragged over to talk to us.
I immediately feel a kinship with him, even if he’s markedly unfriendly while his brother has an easy gait and an open demeanor.
“Hullo, ladies,” says the smiling one, his voice warm and laden with a thick Irish accent that makes me want to melt into a puddle. “Bum a light?”
Okay, so Meghan may have a point. If he wasn’t holding hands with a girl hot enough to snag a guy who looks like him with an accent on top of it, even if she could easily pass as his sister, and if I didn’t have a boyfriend, I would besointerested.
“Yeah, definitely,” Meghan says. I’ve never actually seen her flirt with a guy. I know she hooks up plenty, but it’s weird to imagine her getting stupid like I do. She’s just like always, though, her same deadpan voice and mild smile as she hands him her lighter.
He drops his girl’s hand and takes the lighter before producing a pack of cigarettes from his hoodie pocket. “What are you girls doing out here?”
“Just hanging out. You?” Meghan says, totally relaxed and calm as she lights her own cigarette when he’s done.
I could never talk to a strange guy. I probably couldn’t even make eye contact. I finally sit up, so I’m not squinting into the sun, and check on the other guy, who’s turned his back on us and is watching Lily play at the edge of the water.
“Visiting my uncle,” the chatty brother says. “Though I may have found better company here. Mind if we join you for a bit?”
“No, yeah, totally,” Meghan says, scooting over on the blanket until I have to do the same.
The guy sits beside her and pats the space on his other side. “Oliver, have a seat, mate.”
