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“We’ve had sex?” She came towards him.
He cleared his throat and rubbed his unshaven jaw with the back of his hand.
“I have to say that if you didn’t know that’s what we’ve been doing, I am very upset with myself.”
“Shut up,” she laughed, encircling his waist with her arms. “I’m trying to bring up something serious.”
He wrapped his arms around her and gazed down at her like she was all he could see.
“Yes, we’ve had sex,” he confirmed, trying to be serious and failing.
“I mean…” She took a breath as she tried to find the right words. “We had sex before, years ago…”
He lifted his chin as understanding dawned.
“But this time feels different,” she said, softer than a moment before. Her eyes dropped to his chest. “Maybe it’s just me.”
She shrugged and moved to leave his embrace, but he tightened his hold, getting her eyes back.
“It’s better,” he confirmed.
“Yeah?” She leaned into him.
Because the sex had been great before. But now it was mind-blowing.
He pressed a kiss to her upturned lips. “Yeah.”
“Why do you think that is?” she asked and then narrowed her eyes. “Did you read a book or something?”
He smiled but it was a different kind of a smile than she could ever remember seeing. Almost like he had a sad secret.
“It’s because I’m all in this time,” he said. He brushed her hair back, pressed his lips to her forehead and held for several beats. When he pulled back, she could see regret in his eyes like he was remembering something he wished he wasn’t. He blinked and it cleared, bringing him back to the present. “I haven’t hidden parts of myself from you. You’re getting all of me. You will always have all of me.”
* * *
Hours later, after they had eaten and watched a documentary on drummers; after the dishes were done and the laundry was folded and placed in her basket to take home, he convinced her to stay the night. To stay with him.
They both knew the next week was going to bring its own stresses and disruptions.
And truthfully, in the back of Nikki’s mind she was waiting for the other shoe to drop.
What if they’d jumped back into this thing without taking into consideration all that their lives already held?
But even with those thoughts, she knew she didn’t want to stop.
She wanted to be with him.
For as long as it lasted.
“What are you thinking?” he asked, threading his fingers through her hair.
She lay on her back, her head on his stomach. She thought he’d fallen asleep.
“How do you know I’m thinking?” she asked.
“Because I can feel it. You get too quiet.”
“Hm. Maybe I just talk too much.”
