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“It’s okay, baby. You will be okay, I promise,” he tried to placate me as we were both brought to shore. Ro’s cock was still hanging out of his open jeans as they shoved him down face-first in the sand.
“Stop!” I yelled. “He didn't do anything.”
My screaming was useless. Ro was being treated like a criminal, and I knew why, but he wasn't the bad guy in this situation.
A cop walked toward me, and I knew what was coming. We were both being taken in. We were both guilty of whatever they thought they knew. Not until we were sat down and calm would we be able to shed light on the truth.
I knew my story would check out. I knew I would be cleared. But I would also do and say whatever I had to in order to make sure Ro walked away without any charges. It was my turn to save him. I couldn’t stop my parents from sending him away when I was younger, but I could do it now.
When it came to Kane, I had no doubt he would be arrested. Lip witnessing him carrying me to his building was damning enough. As worried as I was in the moment, as my hands were cuffed behind my back, I knew all the evidence would set us free. We were guilty of a lot of shit, we had a lot to answer for, but none of it would cost us our freedom.
We were both walked toward the parking lot, both of us being silent. My heart was beating at a rapid pace, like a staccato in the middle of a cadenza. As we reached the parking lot we were separated. Ro was shoved into one police car and I into another.
When I looked back at the third police car, I could see the face of Kane, pressed against the window and blood painting his entire face red.
Ro hadn’t killed him, but the way his face was mangled told me he wasn’t far from demise. I didn’t expect to see Kane again that evening, thinking he would be deemed the victim and taken somewhere safe and coddled. I was happy he was in the back of a police car, exactly where he deserved to be. But even the image of him back there didn’t keep me from shaking and gagging at the memory of his hands on me.
I broke down when I got into the car, sobbing as quietly as I could—both in relief and in frustration. Maybe I should’ve walked away. Maybe I should’ve asked Ro to leave instead of telling him to kill Kane. Maybe this wouldn’t end well after all.
Regret was a heavy lump in my gut, but I couldn’t take it back now. It hung there like a chain around my neck, unwilling to loosen. The only thing I could do was tell the truth, and if the truth didn’t work, I’d lie. I’d finally found something that meant more to me than the past and more to me than any drug ever did. I fell in love with Rohlen, and I would be damned if this was where it all ended for us.
They unloaded us separately, guaranteeing we wouldn’t see or talk to one another. I was taken to a room, allowed to clean up a little, allowed to have water, and given a blanket as my body shivered in the cold A/C.
Someone eventually came in and asked me questions, easy questions. I had nothing to hide, and I had nothing to lie about. And if they thought I had been lying about the trauma Kane inflicted on me, my constant gagging sealed the truth.
Despite that, the night and questions dragged on for what seemed like hours. I would be left alone for a bit, only for them to come back with more questions. It didn’t take a genius to realize they were questioning Ro at the same time, probably Kane too.
They offered to let me call home, call someone. But I refused. My parents wouldn’t care about what I had been through, just the drama that it caused them. Plus, I didn’t want to tell them I had reconnected with Ro, or that Kane was back in my life. This was our little secret and telling my parents would make it dirtier than it had to be.
So no calls and no help.
In the end, my truth set us free. For the first time in my entire life, I opened up to a stranger about my childhood. I gave the cops what I had yet to give Lisa—details.
Then I gave them the details of the whole night.
They did a swab of my mouth to corroborate my story and were able to detect remnants of Kane in my mouth.
A weight lifted from my chest when I was told I could leave and again when I saw Ro in the lobby, just as free as I was. We reconnected and held on to each other as they explained the charges being filed against Kane.
I glanced around the station, catching a glimpse of Kane looking at us through the glass of the room he was in. He sat there grinning. Blood trailing from his nose and covering his teeth. His tongue lashed out and licked it as I walked toward him a little. A shudder raced through my body, but I was brave knowing he was locked behind the glass. I just needed one more look at him. His eyes were black and blue, and he still tried to give me a pathetic wink.
It was at that moment I knew that he fucked himself over just as much as Ro and I telling our truth did. He wasn’t right; he wasn’t okay. Any cop worth their meager wage would see right through him.
“Fuck you,” I mouthed through the window, wanting one last word.
With a grin spread across his face, he mouthed back, “When?” His taunt didn’t have the same impact it had earlier. It hit differently knowing I didn’t have to fear him anymore.
As I returned to the lobby to stand by Ro, I saw Mrs. Tessier standing there watching me, disapproval all over her face. She was glancing back and forth between Ro and me, her hands on her hips and her foot tapping. I am assuming it was Ro that called her and she had been woken up to retrieve us both. She wasn’t happy about it at all.
I worried for Ro; he had a lot to lose when it came to Mrs. Tessier. She was his boss, and for all intents and purposes, she was his parental figure in this situation.
My eyes found him, and I gave him a look that saidI’m sorry. He smiled, shrugged his shoulders, and said it was okay. We’d take what was coming for us.
The good news was Mrs. Tessier didn’t have the right to know the whole story. We were adults, and although she would demand answers from Ro and me, she couldn’t get those answers from the cops.
Mrs. Tessier reprimanded Ro quickly for the trouble she knew about and then turned on her heels, expecting us to follow her. Our fingertips danced together ever so slowly behind her back, needing to touch each other but being aware we were still in a state of disguise.
We both got into the back seat of Mrs. Tessier’s car and sat in silence. The whole way back to rehab, there was nothing but sea breeze through the cracked windows and the sound of our breathing. Quiet and all-consuming. I took a deep breath into my lungs, trying to get drunk on the oxygen and trying to think about how the hell we ended up here.
