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I take his hand, the one stroking my hip, and pull it from me.
“I’m married,” I say again. “And even if this is a dream, what you’re doing, it’s not okay.” I gesture between the two of us. “Whatever this is, it isn’t okay.”
Robert leans close and looks into my eyes as if he’s checking if I’m serious.
“Becca.” He mimics my gesture, motioning between us, “Thishas been going on for three years.”
Three years!
“Does he know?”
Robert scoffs, a bitter sound. “The great Aaron McCormick? You know as well as I do that his ego would never allow him to suspect that his wife and best friend don’t love him as much as the rest of the world. You know he doesn’t know.” His eyelids twitch then and he focuses on me. “Unless, he said something?”
Unbelievable.
My demons, they’ve reared up to the surface, and here they are, ready for me to slay. “What happens when we leave?”
Robert’s shoulders relax and he leans over me, the muggy heat swarming us. “We move to New York. Start over, just you and me.”
“The kids?”
“Don’t tell me you’re having second thoughts. They’re better here. Aaron will take care of them.”
“That’s reprehensible.”
His mouth tightens. “It was your idea. It’s what you want.”
My breath catches, because leaving them behind would be just like what my mum did to me.
“I want to leave my own kids? To live in New York with you?”
“Yes,” he says, his voice urgent, eyes on my mouth.
“I love you?”
“Desperately.”
“And not my husband?”
“Not for years. Not ever.”
“And not my kids?”
“You don’t want them.”
“I’m an asshole.”
“You’re an angel.”
“You’re an asshole.”
“You love me that way.”
I duck under Robert’s arm and move closer to the light puncturing the deep shadow of the eaves and the tropical leaves. I straighten my dress and wipe my mouth with the back of my hand, wiping Robert away. “I’m going to say this once, and only once.”
Robert tilts his head and I notice that air of naivety is gone, replaced by simmering intelligence and drive.
“I don’t do this. We aren’t doing this. I don’t leave my kids. I don’t leave my husband. I don’t have affairs.”
