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She shrugged. “I kind of guessed after what you said on the tour bus.”
It was after Jimmy had hit her and she was trying to distance herself from Ronnie that I’d told Amber my story. I’d only hinted at who the man was, but I’d seen the realisation in her eyes.
“I didn’t want to say, seeing as you hadn’t told me directly. Does anyone else know?”
“Joey and Ali, oh and Laura. Joey only just found out.” I gave a hollow laugh. “He forced it out of Ali so he could come over all ‘He Man’ for me. He didn’t take it well.”
Amber winced. “God, imagine finding out another drummer hurt the woman you love.”
“Hang on a minute, I told you he doe?—”
“Please Destiny,” she interrupted me with a scoff. “You know he does.Iknow he does, and I never even realised you were a thing.”
We both burst out laughing and instantly I felt much lighter. I was glad I’d told her everything and maybe she was right, maybe things would feel different in the morning. I just wasn’t sure I had the guts to see it through.
CHAPTER 29
JOEY
The gardens to the hotel were lit up with fairy lights, and if I was Ronnie I’d have thought it was pretty. I wasn’t him though, and I was finding the twinkling white lights irritating if I was being honest.
I’d gone outside to get some fresh air and calm myself down after the fucking shit show with Destiny. I should have known that me showing violence would upset her. I should have known me being more sensible and just escorting the guy out of the bar would have gone down better. I should have known but I didn’t, and that probably proved that she was right; we weren’t meant for each other.
When I saw smoke twisting into the night air from behind a hedge, I suddenly had a craving for a cigarette. I didn’t have any but maybe I could beg one from whoever it was smoking. Stuffing my hands into my pockets, I headed in the direction of the smell of nicotine. When I rounded the hedge I pulled to a stop.
“Daisy.”
Taking a hard drag on her cigarette, she narrowed her eyes on me and pushed her shoulders back. I didn’t know what to say but waiting for her to speak felt cowardly.
“You okay?” I finally said, clearing my throat.
She blew out a ring of smoke and flicked ash into a pot on the bench next to her. Drawing out the silence while she looked out over the gardens she eventually looked back at me and nodded.
“I’m fine.” The cigarette went back to her lips but this time the drag was short before she stubbed it out. “What about you?”
“Me?” I was shocked she’d even spoken to me, never mind being interested in my welfare.
“There’s no one else here, is there?” I wasn’t sure because of the sunglasses she was wearing, in the dark, but imagined she was rolling her eyes.
“I know that, but I hardly expected you to care how I felt.” I took a tentative step towards the bench she was sitting on. “After what happened earlier.”
“Yeah well, maybe I’m not as stupid as you.”
“It was instinct, Daisy. I fucking hated what he said, and I care about you.”
She stiffened, pushing her shoulders back. “Seeing you throwing punches wasn’t what I needed,” she said through gritted teeth. “The blood, Joey, it was…”
Shame engulfed me. “I know and I should have thought.”
“You didn’t, though, did you?” she stated. “It was awful. It brought it all back.”
I didn’t think I could feel any worse than I already did, but her words meant that I did. When she pulled her huge coat tighter around her tiny body, I didn’t think I’d ever seen her look more vulnerable. All I wanted to do was pull her into my arms and repeat over and over how sorry I was.
Risking my bollocks, I went and sat beside her. Before she could move away from me, I grabbed her hand and folded both of mine around it.
“I am sorry, Daisy. I just saw red. If I’d thought for one minute that it would bring those memories back, I would neverhave done it. I swear.” I looked her directly in the eye, hoping that she believed me. Hoping that she knew I wouldneverdo anything to hurt her.
Taking a deep breath, she looked down at our hands and for a moment I thought she was going to pull hers away. When she exhaled, her whole body relaxed and she leaned back, taking me with her. Relief rushed through me, and I pulled her a little closer.
