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“What’s wrong,leanbh?”
Tears begin to well in Emily’s eyes and fall down her cheeks.
“It’s going to happen again.”
Caetlin and I glance at each other and then it hits me. She’s remembering the night Conor was murdered. She’s remembering another traumatic event in her life and she’s spiraling.
“I need to leave.” She says and then takes off toward the doors.
Paige sees Emily running and blocks me from going after her.
“Is she okay?”
Ignoring Paige, I run after Emily.
I can’t breathe. I can’t fucking breathe! This is too much. I shouldn’t have ignored everything telling me that I wasn’t okay. That being here wasn’t okay.
“Give me the keys!” I scream at the valet. He frantically searches for the SUV keys before tossing them into my palm.
“Emily!” Liam calls my name, but I can’t face him. Not now. I need to get away from here. I need something – anything to make this panic stop.
I’m in the vehicle and driving away right as Liam reaches me. He runs next to the SUV, slamming his hand on the window and screaming for me to stop.
My foot slams on the gas and I speed down the road.
As I drive back toward the estate, I have flashes of that night. The bullets flying, the sounds of screaming and cutlery crashing on the ground. The feeling of blood splattering on my skin.
It’s all too much. My vision is blurring more with each passing second. The tears are making it nearly impossible to drive. Horns honk and curses are thrown my way as I rush through traffic.
“Move!” I shriek, swiping my arm back and forth, trying to get people out of my way. I nearly crash multiple times in my attempts to put distance between me and the party.
When I finally start driving up the private road to the estate, my breathing becomes a little easier. My mind continues to flash with the memory of driving up this road, of Liam holding my body, of throwing myself into Declan’s arms.
Skidding to a stop and shifting intopark, I throw open the door – not bothering to turn off the SUV – and sprint inside and up the stairs to my room.
I’m desperately moving my clothes and my dresser to get to the hole where I know my escape hides. Where I know I’ll find the numbness I need right now.
My hands are trembling uncontrollably when I pull the box containing the stash of medications I kept away from Liam. I open the lid with enough force to send the capsules and tablets flying around me.
I blindly pick up a tablet and dry swallow it.
The sound of the front door bursting open and hitting the wall startles me.
“Emily!” Liam yells but I don’t respond.
As quickly as possible, I collect as much medication as possible and throw it into the box.
The sounds of Liam’s steps draw closer. I’m not going to have enough time to hide this.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
I search for a shelf to set the box on and then push the dresser as close to its original spot as possible.
“Emily, where are you?”
I swallow another pill before exiting my closet and facing Liam.
His face is flushed, eyes are wide with worry. When he sees me and rushes toward me and cups my face.
