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“And all that stuff about special networks you have access to?”
“I mean… I’m good with a computer?”
I growled low in the back of my throat, and I couldn’t help but think my wolfman would’ve been proud of it. “No.”
“Oh, come on,” he whined, grabbing my arm when I tried to back away. “I meant it when I said I’d help you find him. I thought you said you missed him. Wouldn’t it all be worth it if I could track him down for you?” He sounded desperate, his grip on me tight enough to bruise.
“Let go,” I hissed, jerking my arm back hard. “You’re hurting me!”
My rising voice had heads turning, and more than a few alphas looked ready to interfere. The bartender made his way over. “Is there a problem here?” He was looking at me,and when Eric tried to explain, the man held his hand up and said, “I wasn’t asking you. Well?” he said, turning back to me.
“Yes, there’s a problem. I want to go home. Now.”
The bartender nodded. “I’ll call you a cab. And you,” he added, jabbing his finger at Eric. “You’re going to stay seated right there until after he leaves. Got it?”
Eric’s upper lip curled in a sneer. “Yeah, I got it,” he snapped.
I shuddered. The guy looked nothing like he’d first appeared, just a nice guy offering a hand. His body language was tense, with a whole repressed-violence vibe going on. How had I not noticed it? Was I that drunk?
The bartender, whose named turned out to be Mike, tracked down my glasses and waited with me until the cab pulled up out front, then made sure I was sober enough to get home safely. “Call the bar if you need anything,” he said. “I’ll be here till three, and I’m working most nights.”
“Thanks,” I told him genuinely. Just before the cab pulled away from the curb, I looked back at him out the window, and I swore his eyes had a weird sheen to them, reflecting the light much like a cat’s would. My jaw dropped, but I blinked and it was gone, so fast I was sure I’d imagined it.
I obviously drank way too much, I thought, rubbing my eyes. What I really needed was a good night’s sleep.
The entire ride home, I thought over what Eric had offered. Would he really have been able to help me find my mystery man? Should I have considered it? All instincts said no, but I was just bordering on desperate enough to do anything at this point.
The cab dropped me off at my apartment, and I slogged my way up the front steps and into the elevator. When I was spit out at my floor, I dragged my feet down the hall, unlocked my apartment door, and dropped my jacket and keys right there. Sighing, I slid down to the floor, leaning heavily against the door. What the hell was happening to me? I didn’t feel like myself. Maybe I needed to see my doctor. What if I had a brain tumor or something, making me believe things that weren’t true?
Even as I thought about it, though, my heart told me that wasn’t it. I wasn’t crazy, and I wasn’t sick. It didn’t make sense to call what I felt love, but it was somehowbiggerthan love.
Since I’d had to abandon my food mostly untouched at the bar, I forced myself up off the floor and headed to the kitchen to make a sandwich. I’d lost a bit of weight lately, between all the hiking and the stress, but I was alreadypretty scrawny to begin with. I couldn’t really afford to lose more.
Carrying my sandwich to bed with me, I flopped on top of the covers fully dressed. “Where are you?” I asked out loud, hoping that somehow my words would be carried through the ether to my man’s ears.
As I took a bite of my sandwich, I looked down at my arm where bruises had started to rise. I traced my fingertip over the outline of Eric’s grip. My mouthful of food was hard to swallow, turning into paste as a tingle of fear managed to work its way through the drunk haze.
He wanted to find my wolf, and no matter his explanation, it was clearly not for any altruistic purpose. What if my wolf needed to know there was someone looking for him? What if he needed my help? I knew logically that it was getting too cold at night to go camping, but now, when it was late and I had more alcohol than blood in my veins, I could convince myself of anything.
I refused to go all winter without seeing him again.Just one… more… trip…I thought, yawning as I drifted off to sleep, sandwich in hand.
Chapter 5
Jude
A few months ago,the simple cabin had looked so impersonal, but it had been entirely transformed.
I knew Shan meant well when he’d built it for me. He wanted me to feel like I was a part of the pack—and I did—but one look at the cabin’s bare walls and floor had been enough for me. For my wolf, too. We preferred the outdoors. We’d spent enough time trapped inside, and sleeping in a tent made me feel safer. Like I could escape in any direction. It wasn’t perfect, though. As the weather turned toward fall, it had started getting cold at night. Not so cold that I needed to sleep in my fur yet. For now, all I needed was my sleeping bag.
True to his word, after I’d spoken with Shan about moving Vesta to the camp, we’d all headed over to her cabin first thing the next morning. She’d just been sitting on theedge of her bed, a small bag in her lap, packed with a few belongings. I’d been expecting her to argue the move. Hell, I’d beenhopingfor it. But it was like there was no fight left in her. “I’ll need my worktable,” she’d said, “and all my supplies.”
It wasn’t an easy hike back, loaded down with a sturdy table and bins of herbal supplies, knives, and a large cast-iron pot, but the hardest part for me was carrying Vesta. She hadn’t argued that either.
I’d bent down and taken her gently in my arms. “I’m sorry, Grandmother,” I’d said, hoping that the term of endearment might soften any embarrassment she might feel at needing help for the first time, but she’d simply patted my cheek.
“It’s okay. I trust you won’t drop me.” I hadn’t.
Now, I hardly recognized the cabin. Tristan had pulled some strings with his father-in-law, and within just a few hours, there’d been a giant moving truck rocking and rolling its way down the narrow road leading into camp. It was a good thing we’d had the road leveled last fall and covered with a fresh layer of gravel, otherwise there would’ve been no chance for it. Joseph Caruso himself had hopped down from the passenger seat, clapped his hands once, and said, “The cavalry has arrived. Now, put me to work!”
