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The only problem is, I don’t regret it. I’d do it again in a heartbeat.
I part my dry lips. “You hungry?”
He shakes his head. “No. You?”
“A little.”
He picks up the apple I placed on the bedside table the other night, the one he tossed to me before disappearing. He has no knife, so he bites a piece from it. I watch as he takes the chunk from his mouth and puts it between my lips.
Breathless, I open.
It’s the sweetest apple I’ve ever had.
We lay on the tangled sheets as he feeds me, bite by bite, until it’s gone. Taking it from his mouth and putting it into mine. It’s so intimate; I never dreamed it was possible to feel this close to anyone.
When it’s gone, I slide down so my head is on his thigh. It’s thick and hard with muscle. I’m fully naked, and I don’t mind that he’s looking, studying my body like he wants to memorize every inch of it.
“What do you want most in the whole world?” I ask, staring up at the ceiling.
He rumbles in his chest, leaning his head back against the wall. “What you just gave me.”
I glance at him, thinking he’s joking, but his face is sober. I can’t find the words to respond, so I pick at my nails. There’s a smudge of blood on the side of my finger.
“What do you want, darling?” he asks.
“Everything,” I sigh.
He’s silent for a long time, and I wonder if he thinks I’m silly. Finally, he lays his hand on my chest, right between my breasts, like he’s feeling my heart thump.
“That’s a good thing to want,” he says. “You’ll get at least part of it at some point.”
I laugh, even though he’s not joking. He gathers my right breast in his grip, squeezing it. His rough thumb moves back and forth over my nipple, and the feeling trickles down my belly to my clit, making it tingle.
Downstairs, the grandfather clock chimes. It’s late afternoon. I sit up slowly, trying not to wince at the twinge between my legs. He catches me by the elbow and kisses my mouth hard. When we break apart, he gives me a look that pierces right to my soul.
“You’re so beautiful,” he says.
Hisvoice is hoarse and low. I believe every word he says.
I don’t know how to respond, so I curl up against the headboard and pull the sheets over my body. He stands and gets dressed, the gun holster back on his waist.
His expression is sober as he picks up his hat, and my hands are a knot in my lap. I glance up, and I don’t know why, but I want to cry.
“You better go before the men come back,” I whisper.
He kneels beside the bed. I shift to the edge and let my legs hang down between his boots. He’s so big, his head is level with mine.
He runs his hand down my calf to my ankle. His head dips, and he kisses the arch of my foot.
My stomach flutters.
“You’re pretty sweet, Diane,” he says. “I’d like to see you again.”
I swallow. “Um…do you think we’re moving too fast?” I whisper.
He shakes his head once, not hesitating. “I’ve never been surer about wanting to get to know somebody. If you want me to fuck off, Diane, you’ll have to shoot me.”
I laugh weakly. He smiles, and I touch his face, enjoying the prickle of his beard.
