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Out of anyone in this situation, Dean was the innocent bystander. He didn’t have the front-row seat to my crush on Jax like my family. And he certainly wasn’t complicit in the same way Jax was.
It never felt good to hurt the innocent bystander. To tell them you’d lied.
His unwavering support, his genuinely big heart and obvious feelings for me made this a bit like plucking the wings off a butterfly. Honestly, he was so beautiful it wasn’t even fair. And the deep-seated goodness inside him was even more beautiful.
In a strange way, seeing him be a little discomfited by this was a relief.
“Holy shit, Poppy,” he said, swiping a hand over his mouth and leaning back in his chair. After a moment, he stood, setting his hands on his trim hips and staring out into the backyard. He was still wearing his bright blue scrubs, and I’m telling you, a man and his ass had never looked as good in scrubs as Dean Michaelson.
Which was what made it even worse that I didn’t feel those things when I watched him. The tingly things. The press-my-thighs-together things. The heart turning over in my chest things.
“If it makes you uncomfortable, I can tell my mom it’s nota good idea,” I told him. “If you need time to make peace with this, it’s okay.”
Dean tilted his head back and took a seat again, angling himself closer to me as he sighed. “No, I don’t need time. It’s … it’s the right thing to do.” He slid his big hand over my thigh and squeezed. “I can be an adult about this.”
I reached for one of his hands with mine. His eyes fell closed at my touch, but he didn’t pull away. If anything, his grip was tight and possessive, like he was unwilling to let me back away now that I’d initiated.
“Should I be worried?” he asked lightly. “About this man who’s taken up your thoughts for so long.”
I sucked in a quick breath, choosing my words carefully. “Jax is a good man who wants very different things than I do. He’s always been very up front about that. He doesn’t want marriage or a family. I think he’ll support the baby—financially at least—but I don’t have any expectations from him beyond that,” I answered truthfully. “I want to be friends with him. It’s something we’ve never tried to do before.”
Dean searched my face, and I could see his belief in me stamped as plain as day across his handsome features. He slid his hand over my cheek, brushing his thumb along my lower lip. “Okay,” he murmured, brushing his lips over mine for a tender kiss. When he pulled back, Dean wrapped his arms around me, and I melted into his embrace. “Okay,” he said again. “Then let’s have dinner tomorrow night.”
I pinched my eyes closed, letting the warmth of his body be louder than any of the other doubts running through my head.
Chapter 17
Jax
“What’s this?”
Cameron tilted his head, mouth moving as he read the message waiting for me on my phone.
“Ahh. I believe we call those text messages.”
My facial expression didn’t budge.
Cameron grinned. “Looks like my mom got your cell phone number.”
I set my jaw, glancing down at the text again, like I hadn’t read it a dozen times.
Unknown number: Jax, it’s Sheila Wilder. I’d love to invite you over for a family dinner tonight at six if you don’t have any plans. I apologize for the late notice. I meant to send this yesterday, but the day got away from me. If you can’t come, please know you’re always welcome in my home.
Cameron’s eyebrows popped on his forehead. “What about this confuses you?”
I stared at him. “Your mom is inviting me for a family dinner.”
“Good Lord, what nefarious thing could she have plannedfor you?” As he brushed past me, he slapped me on the shoulder.
“I don’t appreciate your sarcasm,” I said to his retreating back.
“You never do. It’s a real shame.” Cameron stuck his fingers into his mouth and let out a piercing whistle. The whirring sounds of machinery died down. “Sorry to interrupt, but I’m about to head out to the Redmond site to check on some things. We’ll be posting if we can’t find anyone, but we’re looking to hire a couple of new people if you know of anyone who’s willing to learn and likes working with their hands.”
Wade eyed me over the circular saw. “Maybe if Jax stopped taking so many European vacations, we wouldn’t need a new person.”
Cameron gave him a firm look. “If I hadn’t been able to spare him, you and I both know he wouldn’t have been gone. This is more for what’s coming down the pipe, Wade. Once the store is done, we’ve got two large builds we’ll be balancing, and this is a great time to do some training.”
I wandered around the saw and clapped Wade on the back. “Maybe if Wade wasn’t so old and grumpy, he wouldn’t scare off the new guys during his training.”
